Criticizing my rhetorical style and accusing me of violating social norms is not something I find helpful.
Until very recently, I held a similar attitude. I think it’s common to be annoyed by this sort of criticism… it’s distracting and rarely relevant.
That said, it seems to me that the above “rarely” isn’t rare enough. If you’re inadvertently violating a social norm, wouldn’t you like to know? If you already know, what does it matter to have it pointed out to you? Just ignore the redundant information.
I think this principle extends to a lot of speculative or subjective criticism. The potential value of just one accurate critique taken to heart seems quite high. Does such criticism have a positive expected value? That depends on the overall cost of the associated inaccurate or redundant statements (i.e., the vast majority of them). It seems this cost can be made to approach zero by just not taking them personally and ignoring them when they’re misguided, so long as they’re sufficiently disentangled from “object-level” statements.
Until very recently, I held a similar attitude. I think it’s common to be annoyed by this sort of criticism… it’s distracting and rarely relevant.
That said, it seems to me that the above “rarely” isn’t rare enough. If you’re inadvertently violating a social norm, wouldn’t you like to know? If you already know, what does it matter to have it pointed out to you? Just ignore the redundant information.
I think this principle extends to a lot of speculative or subjective criticism. The potential value of just one accurate critique taken to heart seems quite high. Does such criticism have a positive expected value? That depends on the overall cost of the associated inaccurate or redundant statements (i.e., the vast majority of them). It seems this cost can be made to approach zero by just not taking them personally and ignoring them when they’re misguided, so long as they’re sufficiently disentangled from “object-level” statements.