I think this is an artefact of (potentially good, potentially not-good) politeness norms among adults.
If I order at a fast food restaurant and they don’t give me the drink I ordered, I will ask ‘and did I order a drink?’
That question is the same kind of fake question as in the child example. I did order a drink.
I know I ordered a drink. I am not asking for information. I am asking for my drink. However, on the whole I think it’s a reasonable thing to say—the blunt ‘you didn’t give me my drink’ sounds to me much more aggressive and confrontational.
Things might be different when speaking to a child, but even so I have a vague feeling that the indirect version feels less like a command and more like a reminder. Your mileage may vary.
I think this is an artefact of (potentially good, potentially not-good) politeness norms among adults.
If I order at a fast food restaurant and they don’t give me the drink I ordered, I will ask ‘and did I order a drink?’
That question is the same kind of fake question as in the child example. I did order a drink. I know I ordered a drink. I am not asking for information. I am asking for my drink. However, on the whole I think it’s a reasonable thing to say—the blunt ‘you didn’t give me my drink’ sounds to me much more aggressive and confrontational.
Things might be different when speaking to a child, but even so I have a vague feeling that the indirect version feels less like a command and more like a reminder. Your mileage may vary.
I think Jeff is normally asking only questions where there is a choice and discusses how to handle when he notices that there wasn’t.