Interesting. I understand how you arrived at that. The sequences and esp. EYs posts are often written in that style. But you don’t need to write that way (actually I don’t think you succeeded at that). My first tries were also somewhat trying to fit in but overdoing it—and somewhat failing too. Good luck. TRrying and failing is better than not trying and thus not learning.
Thank you for your feedback. I am not sure what I think, but the general response so far seems to support the notion that I have tried to adapt the structure to a rhetorical position poorly suited for my writing style. I’m hearing a lot of “stream of consciousness” … the first section specifically might require more argumentation regarding effective rhetorical structures. I attack parables without offering a replacement, which is at best rude but potentially deconstructive past the point of utility. I’m currently working on an introduction that might help generate more discussion based on content.
Interesting. I understand how you arrived at that. The sequences and esp. EYs posts are often written in that style. But you don’t need to write that way (actually I don’t think you succeeded at that). My first tries were also somewhat trying to fit in but overdoing it—and somewhat failing too. Good luck. TRrying and failing is better than not trying and thus not learning.
http://lesswrong.com/lw/dg7/what_have_you_recently_tried_and_failed_at/
Thank you for your feedback. I am not sure what I think, but the general response so far seems to support the notion that I have tried to adapt the structure to a rhetorical position poorly suited for my writing style. I’m hearing a lot of “stream of consciousness” … the first section specifically might require more argumentation regarding effective rhetorical structures. I attack parables without offering a replacement, which is at best rude but potentially deconstructive past the point of utility. I’m currently working on an introduction that might help generate more discussion based on content.