But the moment they encounter someone who genuinely accepts them as they are, without any judgment, they suddenly feel so much better that they can’t help but want to be around you.
Yes yes yes, a million times yes. This is so true for me. My (successful) attempts to modify myself to be more social were sparked off by meeting just such a person. It was a girl I met on the street three years ago. We started talking, then went to her place and spent the night talking. There was no sexual tension at all (though we did have sex much later), I just sat there thinking “holy crap, I’ve been sitting in a box my whole life, I have to learn this.” It was absolutely glorious to feel not judged in the least. I have since learned to project a similar vibe when I try really hard.
Yes yes yes, a million times yes. This is so true for me. My (successful) attempts to modify myself to be more social were sparked off by meeting just such a person. It was a girl I met on the street three years ago. We started talking, then went to her place and spent the night talking. There was no sexual tension at all (though we did have sex much later), I just sat there thinking “holy crap, I’ve been sitting in a box my whole life, I have to learn this.” It was absolutely glorious to feel not judged in the least. I have since learned to project a similar vibe when I try really hard.