I occasionally have these big updates where I realize that women aren’t worth associating with.
Over generalizing.
Then all I hear about the internal experience of women is that interacting with men is uncomfortable and even frightening. This makes interacting with women quite distressing. I am constantly worrying about overstepping boundaries, interpreting subtle cues, etc, even when she’s clearly responsive and wants it. So point one: interacting with women can sometimes be actively unpleasant.
More over generalizing in the face of biased sampling.
Woman come in all styles. Many enjoy flirting. Many like to be pursued, even when not interested. Many perceive a man’s interest in them not as a threat, but as a compliment and an asset. Many like confidence, strength, and assertiveness in a man. Many want a man to be driving the bus. Many are quite sympathetic and understanding about your lack of psychic powers, and are unobtrusively doing what they can “under the rules” to make it easier for you. They are cheering for you. They’re on your side. But they will cut off your penis, drive over it, grill it on a hibachi, and feed it too you if ask for a first kiss. Many, in short, are quite old fashioned, follow old stereotypes of male/female roles, and like it that way.
Much of the comments about what men should do are ideologically driven by what a particular subculture think men and women should be, not what they are. If you look to what women are, you’ll find that they’re generally quite wonderful and adorable as they are, and they don’t hate you for asking them out for a drink even if they’re not interested.
Behave appropriately to the beliefs and preferences of the woman you’re with, and be with a woman whose beliefs and preferences are appropriate to what you want. Life isn’t so hard.
I think what is generally true is that women often perceive men as a threat, and it’s good manners and good policy to try to avoid pressing that button. Before they know they can trust you, don’t put them into a position where they would be unsafe if you had bad intent.
Over generalizing.
More over generalizing in the face of biased sampling.
Woman come in all styles. Many enjoy flirting. Many like to be pursued, even when not interested. Many perceive a man’s interest in them not as a threat, but as a compliment and an asset. Many like confidence, strength, and assertiveness in a man. Many want a man to be driving the bus. Many are quite sympathetic and understanding about your lack of psychic powers, and are unobtrusively doing what they can “under the rules” to make it easier for you. They are cheering for you. They’re on your side. But they will cut off your penis, drive over it, grill it on a hibachi, and feed it too you if ask for a first kiss. Many, in short, are quite old fashioned, follow old stereotypes of male/female roles, and like it that way.
Much of the comments about what men should do are ideologically driven by what a particular subculture think men and women should be, not what they are. If you look to what women are, you’ll find that they’re generally quite wonderful and adorable as they are, and they don’t hate you for asking them out for a drink even if they’re not interested.
Behave appropriately to the beliefs and preferences of the woman you’re with, and be with a woman whose beliefs and preferences are appropriate to what you want. Life isn’t so hard.
I think what is generally true is that women often perceive men as a threat, and it’s good manners and good policy to try to avoid pressing that button. Before they know they can trust you, don’t put them into a position where they would be unsafe if you had bad intent.