Yes. Every time I read a post like this, I wonder “Where are all these horrible overtly sexist men? I have never spoken to one.” I can’t think of a single time I have witnessed or been subject to a man’s overtly sexist behavior, let alone sexual harassment or assault.
But then, I might just be really fortunate. I don’t have a good idea of the proportions here.
Oh, without a doubt. I also live in an enclave of (socially) liberal well-educated people and don’t get out much except to hang out with more liberal well-educated people. So there’s that.
I think environment and priming play a large factor. If you’re comfortable somewhere than it’s easier to shrug off potentially annoying behavior, and if you’re somewhere you’re expecting sexism (or simply primed to expect it from men in general) I think you’re likely to notice it a lot more. I think this is part of the reason you get some people who are like “Ugh I see sexism everywhere it’s horrible” and others go “I haven’t noticed this so much”
Note that I was careful to say “overt” sexism. I haven’t noticed anything that would make me say, “That person just did something obviously, unequivocally wrong.” But I do notice sexism a fair amount, it’s just usually of the “That person doesn’t know any better/ is under the influence of a society that has subtly sexist beliefs, and I could very well make the same mistake when not paying attention” variety.
I can only think that what you’re hearing from women about interacting with men is subject to a really odd selection effect.
Yes. Every time I read a post like this, I wonder “Where are all these horrible overtly sexist men? I have never spoken to one.” I can’t think of a single time I have witnessed or been subject to a man’s overtly sexist behavior, let alone sexual harassment or assault.
But then, I might just be really fortunate. I don’t have a good idea of the proportions here.
I’m willing to bet there are regional variations.
Oh, without a doubt. I also live in an enclave of (socially) liberal well-educated people and don’t get out much except to hang out with more liberal well-educated people. So there’s that.
I think environment and priming play a large factor. If you’re comfortable somewhere than it’s easier to shrug off potentially annoying behavior, and if you’re somewhere you’re expecting sexism (or simply primed to expect it from men in general) I think you’re likely to notice it a lot more. I think this is part of the reason you get some people who are like “Ugh I see sexism everywhere it’s horrible” and others go “I haven’t noticed this so much”
Note that I was careful to say “overt” sexism. I haven’t noticed anything that would make me say, “That person just did something obviously, unequivocally wrong.” But I do notice sexism a fair amount, it’s just usually of the “That person doesn’t know any better/ is under the influence of a society that has subtly sexist beliefs, and I could very well make the same mistake when not paying attention” variety.
I wouldn’t say odd, I’d say rather predictable. The unproblematic happy path is unremarkable, and rarely gets remarked on.