In high school, if a nerdy/awkward/unattractive boy showed interest or even spoke to a pretty, popular girl, he was often subjected to taunts of “creepy/stalker/weirdo” etc. The implicit demand is that loser men should not even dare speak to these women unless they have explicit permission.
It’s important to note that “nerdy/loser/awkward/unattractive” men (and women) frequently in fact lack social skills, which is a major part of what leads to that label being applied in the first place.
I know people who would generally be considered physically unattractive but were very socially popular; similarly I know people who would generally be considered physically attractive who were socially unpopular despite this (significant) advantage.
Unfortunately, social skills are often difficult to learn or even notice one needs to improve, leading to widespread frustration among those who lack them but don’t realize this fact.
My general recommendation is that anyone reading this comment should improve their social skills, and I say this not as an indictment of the social skill level of the average LW reader but rather as advice that applies to nearly everyone, regardless of current status.
It’s important to note that “nerdy/loser/awkward/unattractive” men (and women) frequently in fact lack social skills, which is a major part of what leads to that label being applied in the first place.
I know people who would generally be considered physically unattractive but were very socially popular; similarly I know people who would generally be considered physically attractive who were socially unpopular despite this (significant) advantage.
Unfortunately, social skills are often difficult to learn or even notice one needs to improve, leading to widespread frustration among those who lack them but don’t realize this fact.
My general recommendation is that anyone reading this comment should improve their social skills, and I say this not as an indictment of the social skill level of the average LW reader but rather as advice that applies to nearly everyone, regardless of current status.