Yet the neighbor is still complaining and wants her to turn it down, claiming that she (the neighbor) is unusually sensitive to noise due to some kind of ear or mental condition.
Delicate Daisy should buy ear plugs.
Alice is playing by the rules.
Daisy has a problem, which you correctly point out, won’t particularly be solved by Alice stifling herself.
But Daisy doesn’t execute any agency to solve her own problems, she doesn’t request a favor from Alice, she instead complains. She feels entitled to complain to someone playing by the rules.
One can wonder if Daisy in fact enjoys her problem, and gets real satisfaction out of using it as a club to get others to bend to her will. Because while the degree varies, people do enjoy dominating others.
This reads like quite a lot of bile towards a hypothetical person who doesn’t like loud music.
You don’t know what the neighbour’s tried, you’re putting a lot of weight on the word ‘complained’, which can cover a range of different approaches, and you’re speculating about her nefarious motivations.
In my experience with neighbours, co-workers, generally other people, it’s best to assume that people aren’t being dicks unless you have positive reasons to think they are. And to lean towards accommodation.
The volume of her music is well within what is allowed by the regulations or social norms. Yet the neighbor is still complaining and wants her to turn it down, claiming that she (the neighbor) is unusually sensitive to noise due to some kind of ear or mental condition.
Your response to a neighbor’s playing music “well within what is allowed by the regulations or social norms”, but which caused you discomfort, was to complain to them?
She commented that one of your proposed solutions (earplugs) might not work, citing personal experience as evidence for her claim. In that context, asking if her situation matched the hypothetical exactly is a non-sequitur.
Delicate Daisy should buy ear plugs.
Alice is playing by the rules.
Daisy has a problem, which you correctly point out, won’t particularly be solved by Alice stifling herself.
But Daisy doesn’t execute any agency to solve her own problems, she doesn’t request a favor from Alice, she instead complains. She feels entitled to complain to someone playing by the rules.
One can wonder if Daisy in fact enjoys her problem, and gets real satisfaction out of using it as a club to get others to bend to her will. Because while the degree varies, people do enjoy dominating others.
This reads like quite a lot of bile towards a hypothetical person who doesn’t like loud music.
You don’t know what the neighbour’s tried, you’re putting a lot of weight on the word ‘complained’, which can cover a range of different approaches, and you’re speculating about her nefarious motivations.
In my experience with neighbours, co-workers, generally other people, it’s best to assume that people aren’t being dicks unless you have positive reasons to think they are. And to lean towards accommodation.
Speaking from experience as the person whose suffering was inconvenient, the problem was the bass. Earplugs weren’t relevant.
Your response to a neighbor’s playing music “well within what is allowed by the regulations or social norms”, but which caused you discomfort, was to complain to them?
How does this comment in any way address NancyLebovitz’s?
I’m asking for a clarification from her, on what happened to her, and whether it matched the given hypothetical scenario.
If she wants me to address any particular issue, I’d be happy to, but I didn’t see her requesting that her comment be addressed by me.
She commented that one of your proposed solutions (earplugs) might not work, citing personal experience as evidence for her claim. In that context, asking if her situation matched the hypothetical exactly is a non-sequitur.
Perhaps to you.
If you have your own point to make, feel free to do so.