Statements like “the best vengeance is to live a great life” do not include a call to violence, but they very much do harness vengefulness.
Sometimes deep wisdom makes best sense when interpreted in cultural context of other deep wisdom.
“The best vengeance is to live a great life.”
“And what kind of life could be considered great, oh Wise One?”
“To scatter your enemy, to drive him before you, to see his cities reduced to ashes, to see those who love him shrouded in tears, and to gather into your bosom his wives and daughters.”
A lot of cultural wisdom is aimed to shift our time preference from short-term to long-term. (Delay gratification! Stop procrastinating!) The same pattern also applies to our attitude towards revenge.
Is revenge rational? Hurting your opponent, often getting hurt yourself in the process, doesn’t seem like a utility increasing move on average. Mere thinking about revenge can already be harmful, by distracting you from your other tasks at hand. Therefore, many people conclude that vengeance must be irrational.
That would of course make it a great mystery how such strong emotion could have evolved by natural selection. The answer, from the game-theoretical perspective, is that it is the precommitment to take revenge that provides an advantage. It discourages other actors from hurting you.
That does not imply that the right time for revenge is “right now”. Well, it depends. If the situation is repetitive (such as being bullied at school, every day), each day of inaction signals that you are unlikely to take revenge, which is a bad thing. But if the damage is more of a “once in a lifetime” type, there is probably no need to hurry; the damage is done, it will not increase by taking your time. Realize that the voice the urges you to act soon (or to keep fantasizing about taking revenge all day) is the same voice that urges you to eat your marshmallow now.
What you should do instead, is… well, I guess as a reader of LW, you are probably familiar with the idea of “convergent goals”. Amass resources; gain power; maximize your options. Then you will be in a much better position to take the revenge.
Every time you need some extra motivation to eat your vegetables, exercise, or log off the social networks, consider this: each step you take towards living a better life in general, each step on your way towards the convergent goals, increases your capabilities in general, which includes the option to take revenge for every grudge you have. Plus, you get everything else as a bonus. That is, literally, what a convergent goal means.
Miyamoto Musashi said: “The primary thing when you take a sword in your hands is your intention to cut the enemy, whatever the means. Whenever you parry, hit, spring, strike or touch the enemy’s cutting sword, you must cut the enemy in the same movement. It is essential to attain this.”
Directing your vengeance the proper way, understanding the concept of convergent goals on a visceral level, there is no longer a difference between taking revenge and living a great life. Every step you take towards a great life, simultaneously increases the probability of cutting your enemy, sometimes completely literally, at the end of a long causal chain. This is the timeless ancient wisdom of productive life.
-- Viliam the Psycho, All I Know About Serial Murder I Learned in Kindergarten
Sometimes deep wisdom makes best sense when interpreted in cultural context of other deep wisdom.
A lot of cultural wisdom is aimed to shift our time preference from short-term to long-term. (Delay gratification! Stop procrastinating!) The same pattern also applies to our attitude towards revenge.
Is revenge rational? Hurting your opponent, often getting hurt yourself in the process, doesn’t seem like a utility increasing move on average. Mere thinking about revenge can already be harmful, by distracting you from your other tasks at hand. Therefore, many people conclude that vengeance must be irrational.
That would of course make it a great mystery how such strong emotion could have evolved by natural selection. The answer, from the game-theoretical perspective, is that it is the precommitment to take revenge that provides an advantage. It discourages other actors from hurting you.
That does not imply that the right time for revenge is “right now”. Well, it depends. If the situation is repetitive (such as being bullied at school, every day), each day of inaction signals that you are unlikely to take revenge, which is a bad thing. But if the damage is more of a “once in a lifetime” type, there is probably no need to hurry; the damage is done, it will not increase by taking your time. Realize that the voice the urges you to act soon (or to keep fantasizing about taking revenge all day) is the same voice that urges you to eat your marshmallow now.
What you should do instead, is… well, I guess as a reader of LW, you are probably familiar with the idea of “convergent goals”. Amass resources; gain power; maximize your options. Then you will be in a much better position to take the revenge.
Every time you need some extra motivation to eat your vegetables, exercise, or log off the social networks, consider this: each step you take towards living a better life in general, each step on your way towards the convergent goals, increases your capabilities in general, which includes the option to take revenge for every grudge you have. Plus, you get everything else as a bonus. That is, literally, what a convergent goal means.
Miyamoto Musashi said: “The primary thing when you take a sword in your hands is your intention to cut the enemy, whatever the means. Whenever you parry, hit, spring, strike or touch the enemy’s cutting sword, you must cut the enemy in the same movement. It is essential to attain this.”
Directing your vengeance the proper way, understanding the concept of convergent goals on a visceral level, there is no longer a difference between taking revenge and living a great life. Every step you take towards a great life, simultaneously increases the probability of cutting your enemy, sometimes completely literally, at the end of a long causal chain. This is the timeless ancient wisdom of productive life.
-- Viliam the Psycho, All I Know About Serial Murder I Learned in Kindergarten