I do like the view expressed here. There is a Occam’s Razor aspect that I think helps in thinking about the situation. That said, I do think there might still be some value to the formalizing and publishing policies here.
While one may well find one self on the opposite side from someone that has confided something to you that will often just be one aspect of the larger personal relationship. We often implicitly or explicitly assume that my friend is my friend universally and not just some “fair weather” type friend. Friends accept someone with all their flaws and strengths.
That is really a bit of a naive view though.
Perhaps by being more open in your own policy with people will make them consider the specifics of what’s being shared more critically rather than just assuming the friend is on the same page in this case as they have been in 100 other cases.
While it’s clear that once you have the information you either share or keep it confidential and so find you are on one side or the others. In other words, the person sharing imposes that problem on you—once told you must be on one side or the other. In some cases that might be a hard decision to make. By making known a policy position perhaps the will limit the number of times you are placed in a situation you would really like to have avoided (ignorance can be bliss ;-) ).
So perhaps publishing one’s policies is something of a optimal approach both helping reduce the stress in choosing a side and in even finding oneself in the position of having to make that choice.
I do like the view expressed here. There is a Occam’s Razor aspect that I think helps in thinking about the situation. That said, I do think there might still be some value to the formalizing and publishing policies here.
While one may well find one self on the opposite side from someone that has confided something to you that will often just be one aspect of the larger personal relationship. We often implicitly or explicitly assume that my friend is my friend universally and not just some “fair weather” type friend. Friends accept someone with all their flaws and strengths.
That is really a bit of a naive view though.
Perhaps by being more open in your own policy with people will make them consider the specifics of what’s being shared more critically rather than just assuming the friend is on the same page in this case as they have been in 100 other cases.
While it’s clear that once you have the information you either share or keep it confidential and so find you are on one side or the others. In other words, the person sharing imposes that problem on you—once told you must be on one side or the other. In some cases that might be a hard decision to make. By making known a policy position perhaps the will limit the number of times you are placed in a situation you would really like to have avoided (ignorance can be bliss ;-) ).
So perhaps publishing one’s policies is something of a optimal approach both helping reduce the stress in choosing a side and in even finding oneself in the position of having to make that choice.