I got a lot of mileage out of this technique. Typically I identify something I’m feeling a desire to avoid, don’t want to do, etc. and then ask why I don’t want to do it. If I can’t immediately produce an evidence-based reason based on recent evidence that provides a reasonably well grounded causal explanation for why it’s a bad idea (e.g. I tried to pet that specific dog yesterday and it tried to bite me, so I’m not going to do that again with that specific dog until I learn something suggesting the dog doesn’t generally bite), I mark it as a possible fear and aim to test that fear. Sometimes it turns out the fear was prudent (e.g. I tried to stand up to my bully and they punched me in the face and broke my nose), but often it turns out it was exaggerated (e.g. I stood up to my bully and he hit me but no lasting damage was done). Then, repeat.
I think the way this works is that you give yourself new information you were previously afraid to collect, and once you experience it first-hand, you get the system-1 update (have gnosis) that the thing you were afraid of is less bad than you thought.
Using this technique I’ve overcome a lot of things I’d identify as fears I used to have that I no longer have including but not limited to: speaking to people 1-on-1, showing up uninvited to a party, getting a tattoo, dressing up in a costume, asking someone out on a date, expressing sexual interest, asking for a raise, telling someone I disagree with them to their face, calling people on the phone.
Do the things you fear
I’ve written up this advice elsewhere in more detail as “act into fear and abandon all hope”, but the general idea is to identify things you “fear” to do for a very generalized notion of fear including all immediate feelings of againstness, wanting to move away from something, wanting to avoid something, etc..
I got a lot of mileage out of this technique. Typically I identify something I’m feeling a desire to avoid, don’t want to do, etc. and then ask why I don’t want to do it. If I can’t immediately produce an evidence-based reason based on recent evidence that provides a reasonably well grounded causal explanation for why it’s a bad idea (e.g. I tried to pet that specific dog yesterday and it tried to bite me, so I’m not going to do that again with that specific dog until I learn something suggesting the dog doesn’t generally bite), I mark it as a possible fear and aim to test that fear. Sometimes it turns out the fear was prudent (e.g. I tried to stand up to my bully and they punched me in the face and broke my nose), but often it turns out it was exaggerated (e.g. I stood up to my bully and he hit me but no lasting damage was done). Then, repeat.
I think the way this works is that you give yourself new information you were previously afraid to collect, and once you experience it first-hand, you get the system-1 update (have gnosis) that the thing you were afraid of is less bad than you thought.
Using this technique I’ve overcome a lot of things I’d identify as fears I used to have that I no longer have including but not limited to: speaking to people 1-on-1, showing up uninvited to a party, getting a tattoo, dressing up in a costume, asking someone out on a date, expressing sexual interest, asking for a raise, telling someone I disagree with them to their face, calling people on the phone.