The on-paper outcome of two break-ups and a marriage would probably not have been different. The ensuing drama/ruined friendships/trust issues, etc. probably would have been.
Why would your partner be expected to have respected your wishes when if they had remained “monogamy” given that your partner did not respect your wishes when they were “don’t date either of these two people”?
(In the interest of full disclosure, I don’t have very high priors on nominal monogamy preventing people from cheating.)
I don’t know how much of this is clear from my original description, but the partner didn’t actually want a polyamorous relationship. She wanted a guilt-free way of dating my best friend without having to break up with me. When that was denied, she broke up with me.
The on-paper outcome of two break-ups and a marriage would probably not have been different. The ensuing drama/ruined friendships/trust issues, etc. probably would have been.
Why would your partner be expected to have respected your wishes when if they had remained “monogamy” given that your partner did not respect your wishes when they were “don’t date either of these two people”?
(In the interest of full disclosure, I don’t have very high priors on nominal monogamy preventing people from cheating.)
I don’t know how much of this is clear from my original description, but the partner didn’t actually want a polyamorous relationship. She wanted a guilt-free way of dating my best friend without having to break up with me. When that was denied, she broke up with me.