I have found, to my frustration, that usually when people ask questions in casual conversation, they aren’t really interested in an answer.
Yes; often the point of conversation isn’t so much the literal meaning of the sentences, but the primate social signals that are exchanged. One can be curious about those, though.
You see, when people are asking these simple-minded questions, they are not looking for the typical answer “I’m fine, thanks” or “Everything as usual” what they want is to trigger the memory button you have so that you will say “Did you know John and Lilly hooked up last night?” or ” Jeena had a baby” or “Scott got the job of his dreams” or “Julian and I broke up”
They are looking for information that will give them grand-grand-grand-sons...… even if they must ask 50 times for every time you actually have something awesome to say!
That is why a simple facial or bodily cue is enough for them to know that it is time to push the ignore button.
You see, when people are asking these simple-minded questions, they are not looking for the typical answer “I’m fine, thanks” or “Everything as usual” what they want is to trigger the memory button you have so that you will say “Did you know John and Lilly hooked up last night?” or ” Jeena had a baby” or “Scott got the job of his dreams” or “Julian and I broke up”
I did lots of social experimentation and considered myself well socialized. But I just can’t believe I’ve never realized this on a conscious level. I’ve been systematically studying social interactions for years now yet every now and then another little insight like this strikes me. How much more stuff like this is waiting for me out there?
Yes; often the point of conversation isn’t so much the literal meaning of the sentences, but the primate social signals that are exchanged. One can be curious about those, though.
The important thing is missing.
You see, when people are asking these simple-minded questions, they are not looking for the typical answer “I’m fine, thanks” or “Everything as usual” what they want is to trigger the memory button you have so that you will say “Did you know John and Lilly hooked up last night?” or ” Jeena had a baby” or “Scott got the job of his dreams” or “Julian and I broke up”
They are looking for information that will give them grand-grand-grand-sons...… even if they must ask 50 times for every time you actually have something awesome to say!
That is why a simple facial or bodily cue is enough for them to know that it is time to push the ignore button.
I did lots of social experimentation and considered myself well socialized. But I just can’t believe I’ve never realized this on a conscious level. I’ve been systematically studying social interactions for years now yet every now and then another little insight like this strikes me. How much more stuff like this is waiting for me out there?