In contrast, when I used my regular, “asshole-ish” tone, then yes, at the time they resisted my point with all the rationalization they could muster. But shortly afterward, they’d quietly accept it without admitting defeat, and argue in favor of it later.
Note that this does not automatically mean that it was you who changed their minds. I’ve had similar experiences to you, but I just assume that it means reality in the long run is more convincing than I am in the short run. It’s really pretty narcissistic to assume that you’re changing anybody’s mind about anything, regardless of what voice you use. ;-)
Also, your assertion that you have only two modes of discourse (ineffectual-nice or effective-asshole) is a false dichotomy. Aside from the fact that there are more than two ways to speak, it leaves out any evaluation of who the target audience is—which is likely to have as much or more impact on the effective/ineffective axis than whether you’re nice!
Note that this does not automatically mean that it was you who changed their minds. I’ve had similar experiences to you, but I just assume that it means reality in the long run is more convincing than I am in the short run. It’s really pretty narcissistic to assume that you’re changing anybody’s mind about anything, regardless of what voice you use. ;-)
Also, your assertion that you have only two modes of discourse (ineffectual-nice or effective-asshole) is a false dichotomy. Aside from the fact that there are more than two ways to speak, it leaves out any evaluation of who the target audience is—which is likely to have as much or more impact on the effective/ineffective axis than whether you’re nice!