I have just come back from a surprisingly disappointing OKCupid date. This response may be heavily jaded.
I have spent some time throwing around this idea with other OKCupid users. There is broad consensus that attraction is largely context-based, and in order for a matching algorithm to stand a chance of fostering attraction between two people, it would have to introduce them at a point when they’d be receptive to each other.
A necessary component to this would be keeping a running value on all users’ self-esteem, adjusting it for things like ignored messages and fecundity, and occasionally asking questions like “how long was it since you last had sex?”, “do you weigh more or less than you did six months ago?”, and “has your mother complained about not having any grandkids recently?”
A necessary component to this would be keeping a running value on all users’ self-esteem, adjusting it for things like ignored messages and fecundity, and occasionally asking questions like “how long was it since you last had sex?”, “do you weigh more or less than you did six months ago?”, and “has your mother complained about not having any grandkids recently?”
Who would answer those in a way indicating probable low self esteem? That’d be crazy!
OKCupid does actually ask quite a lot of personal questions, which people do answer. A few years ago the answers were kept private, but now users have the option to make them public, and there exists a certain amount of pressure to do so. I imagine this change results in less honest / accurate answers, but you would still be surprised what people admit to.
The service wouldn’t have to tell you it was keeping track of your self-esteem over time, and matching you with concordant suitors at points when you’d both be most vulnerable to each other’s charms. It would just ask you questions, like a curious but candid friend.
The questions I proposed above were gauche semi-serious examples. There are probably a number of more subtle questions that would correlate strongly with self-esteem without setting off alarm bells in the people that answer them.
Part of the reason for me talking about it is how unpalatable and creepy the idea is, and how a lot of the factors surrounding people being attracted to each other are not available to dating website service providers without a lot of effort they’re probably not prepared to invest. There are probably some areas they can capitalise upon, however.
The questions I proposed above were gauche semi-serious examples. There are probably a number of more subtle questions that would correlate strongly with self-esteem without setting off alarm bells in the people that answer them.
This isn’t something that requires alarm bells. This is a dating website. Full signalling and screening mode is activated as a matter of course. It is extremely unlikely that I could benefit from giving the system evidence that I have low self esteem so I am not going to do so unless all else is compellingly not equal. I suppose this also requires being able to judge what questions have what self-esteem connotations but that isn’t too hard.
It occurs to me that I play OkCupid as a min-maxing munchkin. (I recommend this. It seems to work!)
Part of the reason for me talking about it is how unpalatable and creepy the idea is, and how a lot of the factors surrounding people being attracted to each other are not available to dating website service providers without a lot of effort they’re probably not prepared to invest. There are probably some areas they can capitalise upon, however.
I don’t find it especially creepy. Sounds useful. I want the website to take whatever information I give it and connect me with people in the most effective way possible. Anything I don’t want it to know I will not tell it (I will lie to it if necessary).
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I have just come back from a surprisingly disappointing OKCupid date. This response may be heavily jaded.
I have spent some time throwing around this idea with other OKCupid users. There is broad consensus that attraction is largely context-based, and in order for a matching algorithm to stand a chance of fostering attraction between two people, it would have to introduce them at a point when they’d be receptive to each other.
A necessary component to this would be keeping a running value on all users’ self-esteem, adjusting it for things like ignored messages and fecundity, and occasionally asking questions like “how long was it since you last had sex?”, “do you weigh more or less than you did six months ago?”, and “has your mother complained about not having any grandkids recently?”
Who would answer those in a way indicating probable low self esteem? That’d be crazy!
There are a few answers to this:
OKCupid does actually ask quite a lot of personal questions, which people do answer. A few years ago the answers were kept private, but now users have the option to make them public, and there exists a certain amount of pressure to do so. I imagine this change results in less honest / accurate answers, but you would still be surprised what people admit to.
The service wouldn’t have to tell you it was keeping track of your self-esteem over time, and matching you with concordant suitors at points when you’d both be most vulnerable to each other’s charms. It would just ask you questions, like a curious but candid friend.
The questions I proposed above were gauche semi-serious examples. There are probably a number of more subtle questions that would correlate strongly with self-esteem without setting off alarm bells in the people that answer them.
Part of the reason for me talking about it is how unpalatable and creepy the idea is, and how a lot of the factors surrounding people being attracted to each other are not available to dating website service providers without a lot of effort they’re probably not prepared to invest. There are probably some areas they can capitalise upon, however.
This isn’t something that requires alarm bells. This is a dating website. Full signalling and screening mode is activated as a matter of course. It is extremely unlikely that I could benefit from giving the system evidence that I have low self esteem so I am not going to do so unless all else is compellingly not equal. I suppose this also requires being able to judge what questions have what self-esteem connotations but that isn’t too hard.
It occurs to me that I play OkCupid as a min-maxing munchkin. (I recommend this. It seems to work!)
I don’t find it especially creepy. Sounds useful. I want the website to take whatever information I give it and connect me with people in the most effective way possible. Anything I don’t want it to know I will not tell it (I will lie to it if necessary).
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I would bet a sizeable sum of money that most users do not approach OKCupid in the same way you or I do, consciously or otherwise.
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That’s the sort of thing this algorithm is supposed to flag up.
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Oh sweet Jesus there are more than five pages...