Obsession is nature’s way of making cooperation more resistant to random disruptive events.
I think an important skill in relationships is to be able to see a long-term perspective even when you are in a bad moment. Don’t ruin a mostly great relationship, just because today is the exceptional day that sucks. It can be easy to start a downward spiral. Forgiving is a way to play “tit for tat” in a noisy environment. The simplest hack to make people forgive is to make them blind towards the mistakes. (Which again comes with its own problems, because evolution is so short-sighted. Some people are too blind; some people forgive too much.)
Costly signalling of cooperation is important in situations where there is so much at stake, such as raising children. I am rather conservative about relationships because… well, if I simplify it a lot, conservatism at its core is all about costly signalling.
Sorry, I’m rambling, because of lack of sleep. So I’ll stop now.
Obsession is nature’s way of making cooperation more resistant to random disruptive events.
I think an important skill in relationships is to be able to see a long-term perspective even when you are in a bad moment. Don’t ruin a mostly great relationship, just because today is the exceptional day that sucks. It can be easy to start a downward spiral. Forgiving is a way to play “tit for tat” in a noisy environment. The simplest hack to make people forgive is to make them blind towards the mistakes. (Which again comes with its own problems, because evolution is so short-sighted. Some people are too blind; some people forgive too much.)
Costly signalling of cooperation is important in situations where there is so much at stake, such as raising children. I am rather conservative about relationships because… well, if I simplify it a lot, conservatism at its core is all about costly signalling.
Sorry, I’m rambling, because of lack of sleep. So I’ll stop now.
That’s very interesting, I never thought of it like that before.
No need to apologize—If you want to keep rambling, I’ll be listening.