Saying “you should x” (in the moral sense of the word) is just equivalent to saying “I would prefer you to x”, but with bonus social pressure.
I really think this is a bad summarization of how moral injuctions act. People often feel a conflict for example between “I should X” and “I would prefer to not-X”. If a parent has to choose between saving their own child, and a thousand other children, they may very well prefer to save their own child, but recognize that morality dictated they should have saved the thousand other children.
My own guess about the connection between morality and preferences is that morality is an unconscious estimation of our preferences about a situation, while trying to remove the bias of our personal stakes in it. (E.g. the parent recognizes that if their own child wasn’t involved, if they were just hearing about the situation without personal stakes in it, they would prefer that a thousand children be saved rather that only one.)
If my guess is correct it would also explain why there’s disagreement about whether morality is objective or subjective (morality is a personal preference, but it’s also an attempt to remove personal biases—it’s by itself an attempt to move from subjective preferences to objective preferences).
This is because people are bad at making decisions, and have not gotten rid of the harmful concept of “should”. The original comment on this topic was claiming that “should” is a bad concept; instead of thinking “I should x” or “I shouldn’t do x”, on top of considering “I want to/don’t want to x”, just look at want/do not want. “I should x” doesn’t help you resolve “do I want to x”, and the second question is the only one that counts.
I think that your idea about morality is simply expressing a part of a framework of many moral systems. That is not a complete view of what morality means to people; it’s simply a part of many instantiations of morality. I agree that such thinking is the cause of many moral conflicts of the nature “I should x but I want to y”, stemming from the idea (perhaps subconscious) that they would tell someone else to x, instead of y, and people prefer not to defect in those situations. Selfishness is seen as a vice, perhaps for evolutionary reasons (see all the data on viable cooperation in the prisoner’s dilemma, etc.) and so people feel the pressure to not cheat the system, even though they want to. This is not behavior that a rational agent should generally want! If you are able to get rid of your concept of “should”, you will be free from that type of trap unless it is in your best interests to remain there.
Our moral intuitions do not exist for good reasons. “Fairness” and it’s ilk are all primarily political tools; moral outrage is a particularly potent tool when directed at your opponent. Just because we have an intuition does not make that intuition meaningful. Go for a week while forcing yourself to taboo “morality”, “should”, and everything like that. When you make a decision, make a concerted effort to ignore the part of your brain saying “you should c because it’s right”, and only listen to your preferences (note: you can have preferences that favor other people!). You should find that your decisions become easier and that you prefer those decisions to any you might have otherwise made. It also helps you to understand that you’re allowed to like yourself more than you like other people.
I really think this is a bad summarization of how moral injuctions act. People often feel a conflict for example between “I should X” and “I would prefer to not-X”. If a parent has to choose between saving their own child, and a thousand other children, they may very well prefer to save their own child, but recognize that morality dictated they should have saved the thousand other children.
My own guess about the connection between morality and preferences is that morality is an unconscious estimation of our preferences about a situation, while trying to remove the bias of our personal stakes in it. (E.g. the parent recognizes that if their own child wasn’t involved, if they were just hearing about the situation without personal stakes in it, they would prefer that a thousand children be saved rather that only one.)
If my guess is correct it would also explain why there’s disagreement about whether morality is objective or subjective (morality is a personal preference, but it’s also an attempt to remove personal biases—it’s by itself an attempt to move from subjective preferences to objective preferences).
That’s a good theory.
This is because people are bad at making decisions, and have not gotten rid of the harmful concept of “should”. The original comment on this topic was claiming that “should” is a bad concept; instead of thinking “I should x” or “I shouldn’t do x”, on top of considering “I want to/don’t want to x”, just look at want/do not want. “I should x” doesn’t help you resolve “do I want to x”, and the second question is the only one that counts.
I think that your idea about morality is simply expressing a part of a framework of many moral systems. That is not a complete view of what morality means to people; it’s simply a part of many instantiations of morality. I agree that such thinking is the cause of many moral conflicts of the nature “I should x but I want to y”, stemming from the idea (perhaps subconscious) that they would tell someone else to x, instead of y, and people prefer not to defect in those situations. Selfishness is seen as a vice, perhaps for evolutionary reasons (see all the data on viable cooperation in the prisoner’s dilemma, etc.) and so people feel the pressure to not cheat the system, even though they want to. This is not behavior that a rational agent should generally want! If you are able to get rid of your concept of “should”, you will be free from that type of trap unless it is in your best interests to remain there.
Our moral intuitions do not exist for good reasons. “Fairness” and it’s ilk are all primarily political tools; moral outrage is a particularly potent tool when directed at your opponent. Just because we have an intuition does not make that intuition meaningful. Go for a week while forcing yourself to taboo “morality”, “should”, and everything like that. When you make a decision, make a concerted effort to ignore the part of your brain saying “you should c because it’s right”, and only listen to your preferences (note: you can have preferences that favor other people!). You should find that your decisions become easier and that you prefer those decisions to any you might have otherwise made. It also helps you to understand that you’re allowed to like yourself more than you like other people.