You may not be aware that lots of people who criticize women’s preferences seem to consider themselves, or men in general, entitled to female sexual attention, and they show insufficient regard for women’s body sovereignty and self-determination. If you want to evaluate women’s preferences, could you explain how we can do this in a way that respects women’s autonomy? What kind of benefits might women accrue from attempting to change their preferences, and if not, they why should they attempt to do so merely to satisfy men’s preferences?
I like this response! While I expect that in the heat of the moment most people (on all sides) won’t always be able to word themselves this carefully and explicitly, it’s a good general outline for future comments on controversial topics. Upvoted for thoughtfulness.
Thanks. Rather than pooh-poohing from the peanut gallery how other people critiqued komponisto, I wanted to show what I think should have been done instead. I wanted to show that I understand at least some of their concerns.
Nancy actually raised some similar questions here, though I wish they had been raised in an initial response to komponisto before jumping on him, rather than to me when I started defending him.
In case anyone wonders why I didn’t make that sort of response to komponisto in the first place, it’s because by the time I saw his comment, the thread had already started blowing up. It triggered the pattern-match of “guy getting unfairly made into the bad guy,” which resulted in all sorts of negative emotional reactions of my own that made my first priority attempting to mitigate the perceived unfairness.
I like this response! While I expect that in the heat of the moment most people (on all sides) won’t always be able to word themselves this carefully and explicitly, it’s a good general outline for future comments on controversial topics. Upvoted for thoughtfulness.
Thanks. Rather than pooh-poohing from the peanut gallery how other people critiqued komponisto, I wanted to show what I think should have been done instead. I wanted to show that I understand at least some of their concerns.
Nancy actually raised some similar questions here, though I wish they had been raised in an initial response to komponisto before jumping on him, rather than to me when I started defending him.
In case anyone wonders why I didn’t make that sort of response to komponisto in the first place, it’s because by the time I saw his comment, the thread had already started blowing up. It triggered the pattern-match of “guy getting unfairly made into the bad guy,” which resulted in all sorts of negative emotional reactions of my own that made my first priority attempting to mitigate the perceived unfairness.
It took me some time to think of them—they weren’t available as an initial response. And I might not have thought of them if I hadn’t been angry.
Also, I got nastier (perhaps unfairly so) when they weren’t addressed.