Yeah, this is slightly annoying that we have this idiom. And unfortunately people sometimes take an expression of sympathy said as “I’m sorry” as an apology which makes them respond to what you literally said rather than the intent, sort of like if you said “bless you” after someone sneezed and they asked “oh, are you a priest?” or “no thanks, I’m an atheist”.
I think the intent of “I’m sorry” here is to say “I regret this is happening to you” along with some combination of “I feel sorrow at hearing this new”. Still, it’s confusing.
My general policy is to try to avoid saying “I’m sorry” to mean “I sympathize with you” and go for something more direct like “that sucks” or “oh no” or just a wordless expression of sympathy through body language, although sometimes I say it anyway. Language is tough sometimes!
Yeah, this is slightly annoying that we have this idiom. And unfortunately people sometimes take an expression of sympathy said as “I’m sorry” as an apology which makes them respond to what you literally said rather than the intent, sort of like if you said “bless you” after someone sneezed and they asked “oh, are you a priest?” or “no thanks, I’m an atheist”.
I think the intent of “I’m sorry” here is to say “I regret this is happening to you” along with some combination of “I feel sorrow at hearing this new”. Still, it’s confusing.
My general policy is to try to avoid saying “I’m sorry” to mean “I sympathize with you” and go for something more direct like “that sucks” or “oh no” or just a wordless expression of sympathy through body language, although sometimes I say it anyway. Language is tough sometimes!