The typical popular model of sexuality goes something like this. The woman has, i.e. possesses, sex; the man wants to get it from her. She, on the other hand, wants to hold onto it for the best mate she can find (in order to get married, etc.). Therefore his job is to put on the moves, and her job is to put on the brakes. However, if she resists, then she’s a bitch, because he deserves it after all, therefore she better not resist. If she does resist she might just be playing hard to get, because after all she really wants it, so as long as she’s not resisting too hard you can keep pushing anyway, either ignoring her protests or whining until she gives in. If she regrets it in the morning, well, she shouldn’t have been such a slut anyway.
While this is a phenomenally stupid and dangerous position to hold, it does not in any way disprove or even address the claim that these studies are conflating actual rape, of the kind which causes serious trauma and involves forcing someone to have sex with you, (for a wide definition of “forcing”, of course,) with consensual sexual activity which is later “regretted”. I’m not going to endorse that claim, but talking about how some people interpret refusal as “playing hard to get” or selfishness or any of a number of things rather implies that you have pattern-matched Eugine—correctly, for all I know—onto your model of the misogynist Enemy rather than engaged with his point.
While this is a phenomenally stupid and dangerous position to hold, it does not in any way disprove or even address the claim that these studies are conflating actual rape, of the kind which causes serious trauma and involves forcing someone to have sex with you, (for a wide definition of “forcing”, of course,) with consensual sexual activity which is later “regretted”. I’m not going to endorse that claim, but talking about how some people interpret refusal as “playing hard to get” or selfishness or any of a number of things rather implies that you have pattern-matched Eugine—correctly, for all I know—onto your model of the misogynist Enemy rather than engaged with his point.