I’m finally out about my story here! But I think I want to explain a bit of why I wasn’t being very clear, for a while.
I’ve been “hinting darkly” in public rather than “telling my full story” due to a couple of concerns:
I don’t want to “throw ex-friend under the bus,” to use their own words! Even friend’s Leverager partner (who they weren’t allowed to visit, if they were “infected with objects”) seemed more “swept-up in the stupidity” than “malicious.” I don’t know how to tell my truth, without them feeling drowned out. I do still care about that. Eurgh.
Via models that come out of my experience with Brent: I think this level of silence, makes the most sense if some ex-Leveragers did get a substantial amount of good out of the experience (sometimes with none of the bad, sometimes alongside it), and/or if there’s a lot of regrettable actions taken by people who were swept up in this at the time, by people who would ordinarily be harmless under normal circumstances. I recognize that bodywork was very helpful to my friend, in working through some of their (unrelated) trauma. I am more than a little reluctant to put people through the sort of mob-driven invalidation I felt, in the face of the early intensely-negative community response to the Brent expose?
Surprisingly irrelevant for me: I am personally not very afraid of Geoff! Back when I was still a nobody, I brute-forced my way out of an agonizing amount of social-anxiety through sheer persistence. My social supports range both wide and deep. I have pretty strong honesty policies. I am not currently employed, so even attacking my workplace is a no-go. I’m planning to marry someone cool this January. Truth be told? I pity any fool who tries to character-assassinate me.
...but I know that others are scared of Geoff. I have heard the phrase “Geoff will do anything to win” bandied about so often, that I view it as something of a stereotyped phrase among Leveragers. I am honestly not sure how concerned I actually should be about it! But it feels like evidence of a narrative that I find pretty concerning, although I don’t know how this narrative emerged.
I’m finally out about my story here! But I think I want to explain a bit of why I wasn’t being very clear, for a while.
I’ve been “hinting darkly” in public rather than “telling my full story” due to a couple of concerns:
I don’t want to “throw ex-friend under the bus,” to use their own words! Even friend’s Leverager partner (who they weren’t allowed to visit, if they were “infected with objects”) seemed more “swept-up in the stupidity” than “malicious.” I don’t know how to tell my truth, without them feeling drowned out. I do still care about that. Eurgh.
Via models that come out of my experience with Brent: I think this level of silence, makes the most sense if some ex-Leveragers did get a substantial amount of good out of the experience (sometimes with none of the bad, sometimes alongside it), and/or if there’s a lot of regrettable actions taken by people who were swept up in this at the time, by people who would ordinarily be harmless under normal circumstances. I recognize that bodywork was very helpful to my friend, in working through some of their (unrelated) trauma. I am more than a little reluctant to put people through the sort of mob-driven invalidation I felt, in the face of the early intensely-negative community response to the Brent expose?
Surprisingly irrelevant for me: I am personally not very afraid of Geoff! Back when I was still a nobody, I brute-forced my way out of an agonizing amount of social-anxiety through sheer persistence. My social supports range both wide and deep. I have pretty strong honesty policies. I am not currently employed, so even attacking my workplace is a no-go. I’m planning to marry someone cool this January. Truth be told? I pity any fool who tries to character-assassinate me.
...but I know that others are scared of Geoff. I have heard the phrase “Geoff will do anything to win” bandied about so often, that I view it as something of a stereotyped phrase among Leveragers. I am honestly not sure how concerned I actually should be about it! But it feels like evidence of a narrative that I find pretty concerning, although I don’t know how this narrative emerged.