I’m not the OP, but I bite that bullet all day long. My parents’ last wishes are only relevant in two ways that I can see:
Their values are congruent with my own. If my parents last wishes are morally repugnant to me I certainly feel no obligation to help execute those wishes. Thankfully, in real life my parents values and wishes are fairly congruent with my own, so their request is likely to be something I could evaluate as worthy on its own terms; no obligation needed.
I wish to uphold a norm of last wishes being fulfilled. This has to meet a minimum threshold of congruence on point 1) above, but if I expect to have important last wishes that I will be unable to fulfill in my lifetime, I may want to promote this norm of paying it forward. Except I’m not convinced doing so is actually very effective; surely it’s better for me to work towards my own goals rather than work towards others in the hope it upholds a norm that will get my goals carried out later. Or, if my goals are beyond my own ability to execute then surely I should be working to get those goals accepted by more people on their own terms, rather than as an obligation to me.
Your #2 motivation goes pretty far, so this is actually a much bigger exception to your bullet-bite than you might think. The idea of “respecting the will of past generations to boost the chances that future generations will respect your will” goes far beyond sentimental deathbed wishes and touches big parts of how cultural & financial influence is maintained beyond death. See my comment here.
I’m not the OP, but I bite that bullet all day long. My parents’ last wishes are only relevant in two ways that I can see:
Their values are congruent with my own. If my parents last wishes are morally repugnant to me I certainly feel no obligation to help execute those wishes. Thankfully, in real life my parents values and wishes are fairly congruent with my own, so their request is likely to be something I could evaluate as worthy on its own terms; no obligation needed.
I wish to uphold a norm of last wishes being fulfilled. This has to meet a minimum threshold of congruence on point 1) above, but if I expect to have important last wishes that I will be unable to fulfill in my lifetime, I may want to promote this norm of paying it forward. Except I’m not convinced doing so is actually very effective; surely it’s better for me to work towards my own goals rather than work towards others in the hope it upholds a norm that will get my goals carried out later. Or, if my goals are beyond my own ability to execute then surely I should be working to get those goals accepted by more people on their own terms, rather than as an obligation to me.
Your #2 motivation goes pretty far, so this is actually a much bigger exception to your bullet-bite than you might think. The idea of “respecting the will of past generations to boost the chances that future generations will respect your will” goes far beyond sentimental deathbed wishes and touches big parts of how cultural & financial influence is maintained beyond death. See my comment here.