That sounds like a subset of neurotypical behavior. I’m neurotypical and from the very first sentence (“Neurotypicals like social mingling primarily because they play a constant game of social status points, both in the eyes of others (that is real status) and just feeling like getting status (this is more like self-esteem).”) I found it contrary to my experience. Which is not to say it is wrong, and it certainly looks like behavior I have seen, but it kind of suggests that there is One Neurotypical Experience as opposed to a spectrum.
That is reading the initial “neurotypicals” as “all/most neurotypicals” as opposed to “some neurotypicals” or “some subset of neurotypicals.” I think you are trying to describe typical neurotypical behavior, so I would read that “neurotypicals” as trying to describe how most neurotypicals behave.
But I am not the most central example of a neurotypical, so others may find it a more accurate description of their social experiences. I don’t like social mingling, and I avoid most games of social status points. My extroversion score is 7 out of 100, which is likely a factor in not seeing myself in your description of neurotypicals.
2. Does the statement “nerds / neckbeards often have poor social skills” unpack into “people on the spectrum not even noticing that neurotypicals don’t just mindlessly follow social customs, but they are involved in a status micropayment exchange” ?
There seem to be several assumptions built into that unpacking. For example, it suggests that all/most nerds are on the spectrum. My characterization of neurotypical socialization would include mindlessly following social customs as well as enjoying the social game. I don’t think highly social neurotypicals would describe their behavior as a “status micropayment exchange”; that seems like the wrong metaphor and suggests the dominant model as a fixed-sum status game, whereas many (most?) social interactions have no need for an exchange of status points.
Even when a social status point game is in play, I would expect more interactions to involve the recognition of point totals rather than an exchange. “Mutual reassurance or reinforcement of each others status” seems on point.
If the above is the start of a hypothesis, it seems to me that it links greetings and status point exchange too strongly. Greetings are rarely an occasion to gain or lose points, although they may be occasions to discover the current score.
“Pinging” is a metaphor I have seen used productively in these attempts to explain neurotypical social behavior. The greeting is a ping, a mutual recognition that someone is there and potentially responsive to interaction, potentially also exchanging some basic status information.
That sounds like a subset of neurotypical behavior. I’m neurotypical and from the very first sentence (“Neurotypicals like social mingling primarily because they play a constant game of social status points, both in the eyes of others (that is real status) and just feeling like getting status (this is more like self-esteem).”) I found it contrary to my experience. Which is not to say it is wrong, and it certainly looks like behavior I have seen, but it kind of suggests that there is One Neurotypical Experience as opposed to a spectrum.
That is reading the initial “neurotypicals” as “all/most neurotypicals” as opposed to “some neurotypicals” or “some subset of neurotypicals.” I think you are trying to describe typical neurotypical behavior, so I would read that “neurotypicals” as trying to describe how most neurotypicals behave.
But I am not the most central example of a neurotypical, so others may find it a more accurate description of their social experiences. I don’t like social mingling, and I avoid most games of social status points. My extroversion score is 7 out of 100, which is likely a factor in not seeing myself in your description of neurotypicals.
There seem to be several assumptions built into that unpacking. For example, it suggests that all/most nerds are on the spectrum. My characterization of neurotypical socialization would include mindlessly following social customs as well as enjoying the social game. I don’t think highly social neurotypicals would describe their behavior as a “status micropayment exchange”; that seems like the wrong metaphor and suggests the dominant model as a fixed-sum status game, whereas many (most?) social interactions have no need for an exchange of status points.
Even when a social status point game is in play, I would expect more interactions to involve the recognition of point totals rather than an exchange. “Mutual reassurance or reinforcement of each others status” seems on point.
If the above is the start of a hypothesis, it seems to me that it links greetings and status point exchange too strongly. Greetings are rarely an occasion to gain or lose points, although they may be occasions to discover the current score.
“Pinging” is a metaphor I have seen used productively in these attempts to explain neurotypical social behavior. The greeting is a ping, a mutual recognition that someone is there and potentially responsive to interaction, potentially also exchanging some basic status information.