“I wonder what it would be like to have anyone in the world, even a single person, who you could absolutely trust. Or what it would be like for there to be anyone in the world, even a single person, whom you had to tell all your thoughts, without possibility of concealment.”
I think Christians have been wondering the same thing for a couple thousand years. Radical honesty and Crocker’s Rules aren’t exactly new concepts, are they?
Consider Ephesians 4: Speak the truth, but do so in love considering the feelings of others. There’s an obnoxious way to be truthful, and a much more fruitful way to be truthful.
“Speak the truth in love”
“each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body.”
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
Buddhism has this idea too. Here’s a nicely specific bit from one of the suttas, on how the criteria for “right speech” encompass much more than telling the truth:
In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be unfactual, untrue, unbeneficial (or: not connected with the goal), unendearing and disagreeable to others, he does not say them.
In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, unbeneficial, unendearing and disagreeable to others, he does not say them.
In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, beneficial, but unendearing and disagreeable to others, he has a sense of the proper time for saying them.
In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be unfactual, untrue, unbeneficial, but endearing and agreeable to others, he does not say them.
In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, unbeneficial, but endearing and agreeable to others, he does not say them.
In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, beneficial, and endearing and agreeable to others, he has a sense of the proper time for saying them. Why is that? Because the Tathagata has sympathy for living beings.
“I wonder what it would be like to have anyone in the world, even a single person, who you could absolutely trust. Or what it would be like for there to be anyone in the world, even a single person, whom you had to tell all your thoughts, without possibility of concealment.”
I think Christians have been wondering the same thing for a couple thousand years. Radical honesty and Crocker’s Rules aren’t exactly new concepts, are they?
Consider Ephesians 4: Speak the truth, but do so in love considering the feelings of others. There’s an obnoxious way to be truthful, and a much more fruitful way to be truthful.
“Speak the truth in love” “each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body.” “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
Buddhism has this idea too. Here’s a nicely specific bit from one of the suttas, on how the criteria for “right speech” encompass much more than telling the truth:
(Emphasis mine.)