I think personal boundaries are useful for the same reason that gatekeeping is useful, and that intolerance is often linked to personal standards. Why should a country have borders? Why shouldn’t you share deeply personal feelings and thoughts online? I think the reason is the same. When two things are mixed, the result is something in-between the two. The higher force loses from the transactions, and the lower benefits. Thus, it’s only natural that we’d develop skepticism against the unfamiliar.
Your instincts protect you against parasitism and against people who are touch starved for very good reasons. Some people lack this instinct, and make me out to be a bad guy for it, demanding that I hurt myself by considering everyone to be equal.
That said, I still recommend cuddling with people who fit your personal standards (as opposed to any strangers), and warn you that the stronger your self-protective instincts are, the more you will isolate yourself from what’s enjoyable in life. The trick is finding an environment in which you can be innocent and naive and let your guard down and relax, without being taken advantage of immediately. I believe that such places exist, but I also believe that they’re gatekept or isolated to some degree. Friend-groups are arguably such a thing. It’s just like if you find a beach which isn’t filled with people or glass and plastic, then it’s likely a private beach. Innocent people and untouched natural resources share the same principles. Finding a lake which hasn’t been overfished is the same as finding a person who hasn’t been scammed to the point that they’re skeptical of marketing.
I think personal boundaries are useful for the same reason that gatekeeping is useful, and that intolerance is often linked to personal standards.
Why should a country have borders? Why shouldn’t you share deeply personal feelings and thoughts online? I think the reason is the same.
When two things are mixed, the result is something in-between the two. The higher force loses from the transactions, and the lower benefits. Thus, it’s only natural that we’d develop skepticism against the unfamiliar.
Your instincts protect you against parasitism and against people who are touch starved for very good reasons. Some people lack this instinct, and make me out to be a bad guy for it, demanding that I hurt myself by considering everyone to be equal.
That said, I still recommend cuddling with people who fit your personal standards (as opposed to any strangers), and warn you that the stronger your self-protective instincts are, the more you will isolate yourself from what’s enjoyable in life. The trick is finding an environment in which you can be innocent and naive and let your guard down and relax, without being taken advantage of immediately. I believe that such places exist, but I also believe that they’re gatekept or isolated to some degree. Friend-groups are arguably such a thing.
It’s just like if you find a beach which isn’t filled with people or glass and plastic, then it’s likely a private beach. Innocent people and untouched natural resources share the same principles. Finding a lake which hasn’t been overfished is the same as finding a person who hasn’t been scammed to the point that they’re skeptical of marketing.