There’s some large gap between my mindset, and the mindset of the people voting on this thread. I see you’re trying to bridge that gap. But I find your comment, and the response to it, alien, as if you’re speaking some bizarre language where the words are inverted. I understand what you’re saying, but can’t imagine how one could say it and believe it. Insulting people is fun? My attempt to patch things up between me and gwern is destructive? Saying that cruel comments on LessWrong can create enemies is ridiculous? Saying a comment is too rude is ridiculous in a post about optimal rudeness? All these claims are exactly opposite the truth as I see it.
Most of all, the implication that rationality should not govern our most important behavior. You shouldn’t hurt people unless you have a reason to do so. That’s a very low bar for rational (and ethical) behavior, yet somewhere around half LessWrong readers disagree with it?
that fact that you don’t understand this is similarly mindboggling to me.
My attempt to patch things up between me and gwern is destructive?
I read what you said as the opposite of an attempt to patch things up. To me, it seemed like you were deliberately trying to escalate a rude comment into a personal enmity, by reading far too much hatred into it.
You shouldn’t hurt people unless you have a reason to do so.
This is the kind of broad statement that sounds like someone’s a priori self-concieved deontology. It doesn’t have any practical relation to how human interaction generally plays out or is viewed. On the scale of “hurting” someone, Gwern’s insults are somewhere between a punch in the arm and a kick to the nuts. punches to the arm and slaps on the back are WIDELY tolerated and encouraged by our social norms, and so are insults and and verbal put-downs. Unless your point is that we are regularly insanely more cruel than we should be to friends and acquaintances, your reaction to gwern’s moderate escalation is an OVERreaction.
This comment seems to me to strongly indicate you have a big problem understanding humans and should try to deal with it before you attempt to analyze your interactions or anyone’s in a social setting.
What’s a kick in the nuts between friends? We were just horsing around.
But the potential for the illusion of transparency is ridiculous, and such an action smoothly transitions into hazing and/or bullying. Which are also widely tolerated by our social norms, unfortunately, as long as the person being bullied is low-status.
It seems obvious to me that if you slap someone on the back (literally or metaphorically) and they complain, then you should immediately drop all considerations of “insulting people is fun” and stop doing whatever it is you’re doing. Even (especially?) if you think they’re being a baby.
There’s some large gap between my mindset, and the mindset of the people voting on this thread. I see you’re trying to bridge that gap. But I find your comment, and the response to it, alien, as if you’re speaking some bizarre language where the words are inverted. I understand what you’re saying, but can’t imagine how one could say it and believe it. Insulting people is fun? My attempt to patch things up between me and gwern is destructive? Saying that cruel comments on LessWrong can create enemies is ridiculous? Saying a comment is too rude is ridiculous in a post about optimal rudeness? All these claims are exactly opposite the truth as I see it.
Most of all, the implication that rationality should not govern our most important behavior. You shouldn’t hurt people unless you have a reason to do so. That’s a very low bar for rational (and ethical) behavior, yet somewhere around half LessWrong readers disagree with it?
that fact that you don’t understand this is similarly mindboggling to me.
I read what you said as the opposite of an attempt to patch things up. To me, it seemed like you were deliberately trying to escalate a rude comment into a personal enmity, by reading far too much hatred into it.
This is the kind of broad statement that sounds like someone’s a priori self-concieved deontology. It doesn’t have any practical relation to how human interaction generally plays out or is viewed. On the scale of “hurting” someone, Gwern’s insults are somewhere between a punch in the arm and a kick to the nuts. punches to the arm and slaps on the back are WIDELY tolerated and encouraged by our social norms, and so are insults and and verbal put-downs. Unless your point is that we are regularly insanely more cruel than we should be to friends and acquaintances, your reaction to gwern’s moderate escalation is an OVERreaction.
This comment seems to me to strongly indicate you have a big problem understanding humans and should try to deal with it before you attempt to analyze your interactions or anyone’s in a social setting.
What’s a kick in the nuts between friends? We were just horsing around.
But the potential for the illusion of transparency is ridiculous, and such an action smoothly transitions into hazing and/or bullying. Which are also widely tolerated by our social norms, unfortunately, as long as the person being bullied is low-status.
It seems obvious to me that if you slap someone on the back (literally or metaphorically) and they complain, then you should immediately drop all considerations of “insulting people is fun” and stop doing whatever it is you’re doing. Even (especially?) if you think they’re being a baby.