There are lots of situations where precommitting to doing something at some future time, and honoring that precommittment at that time regardless of whether I desire to do that thing at that time, leaves me better off than doing at every moment what I prefer to do at that moment.
“Marriage” as you’ve formulated it here—namely, a precommitment to remain “with” someone (whatever that actually means) even during periods of my life when I don’t actually desire to be “with” them at that moment—might be one of those situations.
It’s not clear to me that the connotations of “insidious” would apply to marriage in that scenario, nor that the implication that marriage is not loving and consensual would be justified in that scenario.
There are lots of situations where precommitting to doing something at some future time, and honoring that precommittment at that time regardless of whether I desire to do that thing at that time, leaves me better off than doing at every moment what I prefer to do at that moment.
“Marriage” as you’ve formulated it here—namely, a precommitment to remain “with” someone (whatever that actually means) even during periods of my life when I don’t actually desire to be “with” them at that moment—might be one of those situations.
It’s not clear to me that the connotations of “insidious” would apply to marriage in that scenario, nor that the implication that marriage is not loving and consensual would be justified in that scenario.