Could you explain how exactly you use alcohol as a social tool? I’m not issuing a challenge or anything; I’m just wondering what your experience has been.
Well, I looked over a handful of LW posts and PUA sites and videos and observed the key steps in socializing; something like “talk and then the other person talks and then get them to laugh and find something they’re interested in and touch people in non threatening ways like on the shoulder when you talk to them.” Then I looked at which of these things I had problems with, and what tools I could use to solve them; i.e. if I wore a fabulous sparkly pink hat a lot, that made it easy to get laughs at first, and if I had a few drinks first it made it easier to say the first few words to the other person.
I don’t know how well I’m explaining this but basically, it can be helpful to emulate being another person; on some level this has to be a brain chemistry event, and alcohol modifies your brain chemistry in an observable way. For me, that way was often helpful to my goals of being more social.
I’ve always chalked up the useful effects of alcohol to be because it alleviates the embarrassment of making mistakes: “Wasn’t my fault. I was drunk.” Being too afraid of screwing up in front of others is a very common problem to have, so alcohol is helpful to a very wide variety of people.
Do you think that particular effect (helpful for emulating another person) could be subsumed under my above analysis, or do you think there’s something else to it?
I think that if we tried to break down which specific chemical reactions we were talking about, we would be talking about the same ones. I haven’t been very eloquent about this and my keyboard is glitching at the moment so it is frustrating to try to type about it. Maybe later I could talk more about the subject but I doubt I have anything new to say.
Could you explain how exactly you use alcohol as a social tool? I’m not issuing a challenge or anything; I’m just wondering what your experience has been.
Well, I looked over a handful of LW posts and PUA sites and videos and observed the key steps in socializing; something like “talk and then the other person talks and then get them to laugh and find something they’re interested in and touch people in non threatening ways like on the shoulder when you talk to them.” Then I looked at which of these things I had problems with, and what tools I could use to solve them; i.e. if I wore a fabulous sparkly pink hat a lot, that made it easy to get laughs at first, and if I had a few drinks first it made it easier to say the first few words to the other person.
I don’t know how well I’m explaining this but basically, it can be helpful to emulate being another person; on some level this has to be a brain chemistry event, and alcohol modifies your brain chemistry in an observable way. For me, that way was often helpful to my goals of being more social.
I’ve always chalked up the useful effects of alcohol to be because it alleviates the embarrassment of making mistakes: “Wasn’t my fault. I was drunk.” Being too afraid of screwing up in front of others is a very common problem to have, so alcohol is helpful to a very wide variety of people.
Do you think that particular effect (helpful for emulating another person) could be subsumed under my above analysis, or do you think there’s something else to it?
I think that if we tried to break down which specific chemical reactions we were talking about, we would be talking about the same ones. I haven’t been very eloquent about this and my keyboard is glitching at the moment so it is frustrating to try to type about it. Maybe later I could talk more about the subject but I doubt I have anything new to say.