‘Vulnerability’ is a highly ambiguous term, though. You can definitely show an ‘emotional’ side (good!vulnerability) without slipping into unattractive ‘beta/doormat’ mode (bad!vulnerability).
You are right in the sense that simply telling people “be vulnerable” is likely fix all issues on it’s own. In general I however think it’s a mistake to think in terms of mode. It’s possible to put on an act in a bar that makes a guy “alpha”. In a deep relationship where both parties are open it’s not possible to put an act anymore and the core shines through.
A guy who’s generally driven in life will be more attractive than one that isn’t. A guy who also puts value on keeping strong relationships with his male friends and who knows what he’s doing with his life will be more attractive than a guy who’s only priority is his girlfriend. Using different tactics of interacting with the girlfriend doesn’t change something about the core.
Elon Musk hooked up with an attractive actress in late 2008 while he both Tesla and SpaceX was at the brink of bankrupcy and he was loaning money for rent. At time where he was sad. He didn’t do any game on the super model but told her about his emotional troubles and the sadness he feels about the state of Tesla + SpaceX. That’s likely very different behavior then what the actress is used to from most guys.
I also think that’s not repeatable by in the same way by a person who doesn’t actually have the drive that Musk has by going to a seminar to learn how to interact with woman like Elon Musk interacts with woman. On the other hand the promise that PUA marketing sells is that you can become successful with woman mainly by focusing on becoming successful with woman.
Elon Musk hooked up with an attractive actress in late 2008 …
That’s my point though. I don’t really know much about this story, but Elon Musk is anything but a beta/doormat—his current achievements kinda speak for themselves. This would surely make a difference, even if at some level he was ‘sad’ and thus low-status.
On the other hand the promise that PUA marketing sells is that you can become successful with woman mainly by focusing on becoming successful with woman.
A better description is that focusing on being successful with women can help you succeed socially in a more general sense, given the right methods/mindset. Though maybe that’s mostly because being successful with the opposite sex is something everyone cares about at some level, and having that kind of goal as a thing you can steadily improve on makes a big difference in your overall rationality.
‘Vulnerability’ is a highly ambiguous term, though. You can definitely show an ‘emotional’ side (good!vulnerability) without slipping into unattractive ‘beta/doormat’ mode (bad!vulnerability).
You are right in the sense that simply telling people “be vulnerable” is likely fix all issues on it’s own. In general I however think it’s a mistake to think in terms of mode. It’s possible to put on an act in a bar that makes a guy “alpha”. In a deep relationship where both parties are open it’s not possible to put an act anymore and the core shines through.
A guy who’s generally driven in life will be more attractive than one that isn’t. A guy who also puts value on keeping strong relationships with his male friends and who knows what he’s doing with his life will be more attractive than a guy who’s only priority is his girlfriend. Using different tactics of interacting with the girlfriend doesn’t change something about the core.
Elon Musk hooked up with an attractive actress in late 2008 while he both Tesla and SpaceX was at the brink of bankrupcy and he was loaning money for rent. At time where he was sad. He didn’t do any game on the super model but told her about his emotional troubles and the sadness he feels about the state of Tesla + SpaceX. That’s likely very different behavior then what the actress is used to from most guys.
I also think that’s not repeatable by in the same way by a person who doesn’t actually have the drive that Musk has by going to a seminar to learn how to interact with woman like Elon Musk interacts with woman. On the other hand the promise that PUA marketing sells is that you can become successful with woman mainly by focusing on becoming successful with woman.
That’s my point though. I don’t really know much about this story, but Elon Musk is anything but a beta/doormat—his current achievements kinda speak for themselves. This would surely make a difference, even if at some level he was ‘sad’ and thus low-status.
A better description is that focusing on being successful with women can help you succeed socially in a more general sense, given the right methods/mindset. Though maybe that’s mostly because being successful with the opposite sex is something everyone cares about at some level, and having that kind of goal as a thing you can steadily improve on makes a big difference in your overall rationality.