Could you give some more details how this male trait surfaces? By words or movements or appearace or is it only visible via the response of your ‘opponents’?
I am quite the opposite. Calm and peaceful.
But I have an in-law who might be like you. Streetfighter in his youth he is now very controlled and somewhat balanced. But one sudden movement or signal of danger and he will be on his toes or at your neck faster than you can look. He can be the sweetest talker and the controlled arguer as long he has the control. But don’t threaten him—he will be your determined enemy. Interestingly he worked in a call-centre and could handle the most escalted clients successfully—possibly because they didn’t threaten him and he could understand them (he mentioned once what he would do when faced with their situation and thought their reaction harmless).
So do you recognise yourself?
Rationality doesn’t require that you are nice. It requires that you win—at your utility function. Are you unhappy with your rudeness?
Thank you for asking this. I’m an improvisation actor and comedian, starting the groundwork for a productions company, and I’ve found that one of my most useful resources is an intimidating presence which allows me to take over a room, often for the entertainment and comfort of my audience. My appearance is part of that, and my body language is strong, but spoken words are the clearest way my dominance is communicated. I am almost impossible to intimidate, and generally I am quite happy with my directness and energy. When it isn’t serving my best utility, however, I call that rudeness and note how I might make myself more effective. As far as your in-law, I was also known to be physically violent in my teen years, but these days I don’t count myself as an effective leader or confident human if I feel I need to resort to violence. Calm, assertive, confident, entertaining communication skills are my strongest utility, and it is tied to my aggression, so no I am not unhappy with my rudeness. Just want to trim away bad habits while increasing utility.
Typically, if they’re talented enough to be funny, I just make them part of my performances, since I’m pretty adept at improvisation. If they aren’t funny, then they can still serve as a butt of jokes. I’ve been moving more towards preparations for online videos or other productions, so the extent of dominance struggles will be people leaving nasty comments on Youtube videos, and me ignoring them. Anyway, I want to be clear that when my audience has a lot of energy and I match it with dominant confidence, that is a form of aggression that is far removed from anger. An audience is more comfortable with someone whom is strong, confident and dominant. If I’m up on stage saying “Well, if it’s okay with you guys, we might do some comedy sketches or… I dunno, whatever you guys wanna do,” Then they’ll get up and walk out. Glad to clarify.
Could you give some more details how this male trait surfaces? By words or movements or appearace or is it only visible via the response of your ‘opponents’? I am quite the opposite. Calm and peaceful. But I have an in-law who might be like you. Streetfighter in his youth he is now very controlled and somewhat balanced. But one sudden movement or signal of danger and he will be on his toes or at your neck faster than you can look. He can be the sweetest talker and the controlled arguer as long he has the control. But don’t threaten him—he will be your determined enemy. Interestingly he worked in a call-centre and could handle the most escalted clients successfully—possibly because they didn’t threaten him and he could understand them (he mentioned once what he would do when faced with their situation and thought their reaction harmless). So do you recognise yourself? Rationality doesn’t require that you are nice. It requires that you win—at your utility function. Are you unhappy with your rudeness?
Thank you for asking this. I’m an improvisation actor and comedian, starting the groundwork for a productions company, and I’ve found that one of my most useful resources is an intimidating presence which allows me to take over a room, often for the entertainment and comfort of my audience. My appearance is part of that, and my body language is strong, but spoken words are the clearest way my dominance is communicated. I am almost impossible to intimidate, and generally I am quite happy with my directness and energy. When it isn’t serving my best utility, however, I call that rudeness and note how I might make myself more effective. As far as your in-law, I was also known to be physically violent in my teen years, but these days I don’t count myself as an effective leader or confident human if I feel I need to resort to violence. Calm, assertive, confident, entertaining communication skills are my strongest utility, and it is tied to my aggression, so no I am not unhappy with my rudeness. Just want to trim away bad habits while increasing utility.
So what happens when someone in the room refused to be initmidated/taken over/accept your dominance? Do you get into status/dominance fights?
Typically, if they’re talented enough to be funny, I just make them part of my performances, since I’m pretty adept at improvisation. If they aren’t funny, then they can still serve as a butt of jokes. I’ve been moving more towards preparations for online videos or other productions, so the extent of dominance struggles will be people leaving nasty comments on Youtube videos, and me ignoring them. Anyway, I want to be clear that when my audience has a lot of energy and I match it with dominant confidence, that is a form of aggression that is far removed from anger. An audience is more comfortable with someone whom is strong, confident and dominant. If I’m up on stage saying “Well, if it’s okay with you guys, we might do some comedy sketches or… I dunno, whatever you guys wanna do,” Then they’ll get up and walk out. Glad to clarify.