I remember when my therapist first suggested practicing self compassion, I felt like I had discovered something that would benefit me in any situation for the rest of my life. In practice, I often lapse into old self critical habits fairly easily, but when I find myself returning to my practice of self-love consistently, things quickly turn around. I think developing a consistent practice of self-love that you feel on an emotional level, rather than just an intellectual level is the key.
The analogy that really helps motivate me to stick with the practice is that of learning a new piano piece. At first, your fingers feel awkward and you use enormous energy to not make mistakes and still you often do, but as you keep with it, you will soon find yourself intuitively and effortlessly playing the piece. I think that this is the ideal level for self love to reside and benefit your life. Practicing it at first feels awkward and forced, but over time, it becomes an intuitive response that arises in moments that you most need it, moments where self-love is often the opposite response to your default one.
I am actually attempting to develop a meditation/mental health app with this philosophy at the center: daily mindful/emotional practice of self love. I think that it’s one thing to engage the material intellectually in the form of books and audiobooks, but another entirely to soak in it day after day, mindfully and slowly. It’s still in it’s early phases but I’d love to hear your thoughts.
I like the piano analogy, in the sense that it seems like self-love is a groove that gets well-trodden and much easier to access on demand. Personally, I did not do any forcing of any kind. It never really felt unnatural or awkward. But I’ve now heard from a couple of people now that that’s how they got started.
It’s still in it’s early phases but I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Thank you so much for writing this!
Some books that have really helped in my understanding of this topic are Self Compassion, Good Morning I love you, and The Gifts of Imperfection.
I remember when my therapist first suggested practicing self compassion, I felt like I had discovered something that would benefit me in any situation for the rest of my life. In practice, I often lapse into old self critical habits fairly easily, but when I find myself returning to my practice of self-love consistently, things quickly turn around. I think developing a consistent practice of self-love that you feel on an emotional level, rather than just an intellectual level is the key.
The analogy that really helps motivate me to stick with the practice is that of learning a new piano piece. At first, your fingers feel awkward and you use enormous energy to not make mistakes and still you often do, but as you keep with it, you will soon find yourself intuitively and effortlessly playing the piece. I think that this is the ideal level for self love to reside and benefit your life. Practicing it at first feels awkward and forced, but over time, it becomes an intuitive response that arises in moments that you most need it, moments where self-love is often the opposite response to your default one.
I am actually attempting to develop a meditation/mental health app with this philosophy at the center: daily mindful/emotional practice of self love. I think that it’s one thing to engage the material intellectually in the form of books and audiobooks, but another entirely to soak in it day after day, mindfully and slowly. It’s still in it’s early phases but I’d love to hear your thoughts.
I like the piano analogy, in the sense that it seems like self-love is a groove that gets well-trodden and much easier to access on demand. Personally, I did not do any forcing of any kind. It never really felt unnatural or awkward. But I’ve now heard from a couple of people now that that’s how they got started.
Happy to, though I’m very busy atm. My email is charlierogerssmith@gmail.com.