My preferred method is to ask “hypothetically, if you didn’t actually want to do that, is there any way I could find that out?” The reason I prefer this is because the people it works with are generally people I get along with more generally, and over the decades my life has been improved by accumulating such people within it. That said, it fails often, and sometimes dramatically.
IME, there’s no one way; cultures vary.
My preferred method is to ask “hypothetically, if you didn’t actually want to do that, is there any way I could find that out?”
The reason I prefer this is because the people it works with are generally people I get along with more generally, and over the decades my life has been improved by accumulating such people within it.
That said, it fails often, and sometimes dramatically.