Pointing out that she seems to just want to panic regardless of the event seems to calm her more than most of my other approaches.
Interesting. I think think that exact phrasing wouldn’t work well with me because when I have bad emotional habits, it generally doesn’t seem as though I want them. I’d do better with a more neutral phrasing like “it seems as though you panic no matter what happens”.
All I can do is guess about the difference—maybe your girlfriend experiences her internal state as wanting the emotions she’s getting?
Thanks for the examples.
Interesting. I think think that exact phrasing wouldn’t work well with me because when I have bad emotional habits, it generally doesn’t seem as though I want them. I’d do better with a more neutral phrasing like “it seems as though you panic no matter what happens”.
All I can do is guess about the difference—maybe your girlfriend experiences her internal state as wanting the emotions she’s getting?
You know, I didn’t really notice that distinction before. I shall have to pay attention to that. I’ll let you know if/how much better that works.