I don’t have an exhaustive and perfectly indexed database of all lesswrong comments stored in my brain.
I’m likewise handicapped, so I have just googled “site:lesswrong.com cusithbell pua”, as I thought it likely that the claim, upon being seen, would be responded to.
It’s quite telling that the implication of the post is that “women don’t like explicit awareness of social reality”, rather than the (more accurate) “women don’t like PUA”.
This was something CuSithBell did see and not construct as a straw man, but it is something someone else constructed as an interpretation of what she read.
Gender ratio matters: It is no secret that rationalism suffers from a paucity of women...There is no easy answer here, but it is important to address this factor as early as possible...Work hard to find interested women, and be careful in the presence of newcomers when trying to sanely explicitly discuss hot-button gender topics
The heavily upvoted reply:
I’m a little surprised to see the issues of LWers interacting with women reduced to “being careful when discussing explicit awareness of social reality” … with a link to PUA stuff.
1) PUA stuff is hardly the only example out there of “explicit awareness of social reality”.
2) It’s quite telling that the implication of the post is that “women don’t like explicit awareness of social reality”, rather than the (more accurate) “women don’t like PUA”.
I was struck how often different authors remarked on the unintended side benefits of their training: better relationships at work, better interviewing skills, more effective negotiations, more non-pickup social fun, better male friendships, more confidence, etc. These guys were able to make major strides in areas that I’ve struggled to improve at all in… without even bloody intending to! This struck me as an something worth taking very seriously!
I find it alarming that such a valuable resource would be monopolized in pursuit of orgasm; it’s rather as if a planet were to burn up its hydrocarbons instead of using them to make useful polymers. PUA ought to be a special case of a more general skill set, and it’s being wasted.
The mention of PUA drags along several associations that I want to disavow (think anything obviously “Dark Arts”). I considered omitting the fact that much of the intellectual heritage of this idea is the PUAers to avoid these associations, but I couldn’t think of another way to tie it together. This idea owes its genesis to the PUA community, but the product is not intended to be its exact replica. Undesirable elements need not be ported from the old system to the new.
The commenter later says:
Yes—and I find that the “Women hate the dark arts because they can’t deal with reality” trope is a very common one (perhaps less common on LW, but common in general). It may be that the OP didn’t intend to imply that, but it may also not be an unreasonable implication to draw given the frequency the argument is made.
I’m going to temporarily limit my editorialization to the framing of the quotations due to time constraints.
So I predict with some confidence that even if they do actually exist in comments that they are treated as trolling.
There was a third alternative: someone else interpreted quite uncharitably, it is arguable whether that interpretation identified the most likely implication of an actual comment, and unarguable that fairly probable benign interpretations exist, but the cited claim did in fact play a prominent role in the discussion and is certainly not CuSithBell’s straw man.
I’m likewise handicapped, so I have just googled “site:lesswrong.com cusithbell pua”, as I thought it likely that the claim, upon being seen, would be responded to.
It’s quite telling that the implication of the post is that “women don’t like explicit awareness of social reality”, rather than the (more accurate) “women don’t like PUA”.
CuSith responding as though such claims were made here is something that is in my mental database. It is the claims themselves that I hadn’t seen.
There was a third alternative
(That’s not a third alternative in any false-dichotamy sense—it’s a subset of “not existing”. I do agree that it is worth mentioning and making more distinct!)
someone else interpreted quite uncharitably, it is arguable whether that interpretation identified the most likely implication of an actual comment, and unarguable that fairly probable benign interpretations exist, but the cited claim did in fact play a prominent role in the discussion and is certainly not CuSithBell’s straw man.
This seems likely and it is also something I consider a real problem. The commenter that you left nameless is no doubt well meaning, as is CuSith. Yet via “interpretation” mentioned by the unnamed then some added overgeneralizations by CuSith we end up with a rather brutal false accusation directed at lesswrongians. That’s just not-ok. Even though it is not malicious or even dishonest (beyond typical creative exaggeration) it is negligent and a harsh enough misrepresentation that it could legitimately be considered offensive.
A lot of conflict could be avoided if allegations about beliefs and expressions thereof were backed up by links or citations. Then we could actually tackle any remaining offensive beliefs or misconceptions rather than getting worked up over Chineese Whipsers! (Is that term considered politically incorrect yet or is China too ‘outgroup’ to have gained careful-word-use privileges? If I used the variant ‘broken telephone’ would people still understand the meaning?)
One stopgap solution would be to have a standardized response for accusations like that.
“You accused but did not provide evidence, which does not show supporting evidence does not exist, though it is evidence supporting evidence does not exist, so your unsubstantiated argument makes me think your position less likely to be true than I had originally.”
YABDNPE
I think we need to think seriously about how to think about interpretations. Right now, I think most people (I might be projecting) try to first figure out what was most likely meant, and then adjust that a bit as their duty of reading others charitably, and take the output of that as their tentative interpretation.
I think we should break it down. We should automatically produce a most charitable interpretation we can think of, as well as a distinct estimate of the most likely original intent, and we should be well-calibrated to accurately estimate the chance that the circumstance has an explanation unlike any we’re thinking of. As important features of interpreting charitably, we need to 1) bear in mind that others’ charitable readings are according to different value sets than ours and 2) bear in mind our imaginations that are attempting to come up with most charitable interpretations with is limited.
An example of 1) would be for the woman who sued the airline over its flight attendant using a variant on a popular nursery rhyme that has an original racist, if obscure, version. For me, judging favorably means seriously considering how she might not believe a word of the philosophy underlying her case, and just have made it in an attempt to get money. For others, my saying this might sound indicting—how dare you accuse her of dishonesty and greed! To me, actually believing she had been wronged would be more unflattering.. This is very important if we try to foster a community of charitable interpretation by perhaps addressing others’ possible non-charitable interpretation but not accusing others of poor interpretation..
I think it corrects for why political correctness can become a lost purpose: to ensure we don’t wrongly think unduly badly of others, a system of criticizing people who appear to do so is put in place that encourages us to call out people when a plausible, if perhaps unintended, interpretation of their words is that they judge people unfairly.
The solution of judging others favorably can’t survive as a meme by slapping down other modes of interpretation, if it tries it will be subverted, so it will take positive good will and praise, not condemnation, to spread it.
Item 2) deals with unknown unknowns, the argument from ignorance we tell ourselves. Smart people who are used to being right are vulnerable to not seriously realizing they might be wrong, or that though they can’t think of how something could be, it actually is.
Something somewhat similar to “This post, for instance, comes off as hostile and dismissive, not a message from someone who is sympathetic to the concerns expressed or willing to examine the matter under discussion. That’s probably not your intent?” could be an ideal. It might be productive if people were used to beginning certain posts with: here is what I think is the most likely interpretation, although this is not an accusation, because I also think other interpretations are fairly plausible given the context, how I usually agree with you, etc.
I’m likewise handicapped, so I have just googled “site:lesswrong.com cusithbell pua”, as I thought it likely that the claim, upon being seen, would be responded to.
This was something CuSithBell did see and not construct as a straw man, but it is something someone else constructed as an interpretation of what she read.
An OP said:
The heavily upvoted reply:
1) PUA stuff is hardly the only example out there of “explicit awareness of social reality”.
2) It’s quite telling that the implication of the post is that “women don’t like explicit awareness of social reality”, rather than the (more accurate) “women don’t like PUA”.
The post linked to includes:
The commenter later says:
I’m going to temporarily limit my editorialization to the framing of the quotations due to time constraints.
There was a third alternative: someone else interpreted quite uncharitably, it is arguable whether that interpretation identified the most likely implication of an actual comment, and unarguable that fairly probable benign interpretations exist, but the cited claim did in fact play a prominent role in the discussion and is certainly not CuSithBell’s straw man.
CuSith responding as though such claims were made here is something that is in my mental database. It is the claims themselves that I hadn’t seen.
(That’s not a third alternative in any false-dichotamy sense—it’s a subset of “not existing”. I do agree that it is worth mentioning and making more distinct!)
This seems likely and it is also something I consider a real problem. The commenter that you left nameless is no doubt well meaning, as is CuSith. Yet via “interpretation” mentioned by the unnamed then some added overgeneralizations by CuSith we end up with a rather brutal false accusation directed at lesswrongians. That’s just not-ok. Even though it is not malicious or even dishonest (beyond typical creative exaggeration) it is negligent and a harsh enough misrepresentation that it could legitimately be considered offensive.
A lot of conflict could be avoided if allegations about beliefs and expressions thereof were backed up by links or citations. Then we could actually tackle any remaining offensive beliefs or misconceptions rather than getting worked up over Chineese Whipsers! (Is that term considered politically incorrect yet or is China too ‘outgroup’ to have gained careful-word-use privileges? If I used the variant ‘broken telephone’ would people still understand the meaning?)
One stopgap solution would be to have a standardized response for accusations like that.
“You accused but did not provide evidence, which does not show supporting evidence does not exist, though it is evidence supporting evidence does not exist, so your unsubstantiated argument makes me think your position less likely to be true than I had originally.”
YABDNPE
I think we need to think seriously about how to think about interpretations. Right now, I think most people (I might be projecting) try to first figure out what was most likely meant, and then adjust that a bit as their duty of reading others charitably, and take the output of that as their tentative interpretation.
I think we should break it down. We should automatically produce a most charitable interpretation we can think of, as well as a distinct estimate of the most likely original intent, and we should be well-calibrated to accurately estimate the chance that the circumstance has an explanation unlike any we’re thinking of. As important features of interpreting charitably, we need to 1) bear in mind that others’ charitable readings are according to different value sets than ours and 2) bear in mind our imaginations that are attempting to come up with most charitable interpretations with is limited.
An example of 1) would be for the woman who sued the airline over its flight attendant using a variant on a popular nursery rhyme that has an original racist, if obscure, version. For me, judging favorably means seriously considering how she might not believe a word of the philosophy underlying her case, and just have made it in an attempt to get money. For others, my saying this might sound indicting—how dare you accuse her of dishonesty and greed! To me, actually believing she had been wronged would be more unflattering.. This is very important if we try to foster a community of charitable interpretation by perhaps addressing others’ possible non-charitable interpretation but not accusing others of poor interpretation..
I think it corrects for why political correctness can become a lost purpose: to ensure we don’t wrongly think unduly badly of others, a system of criticizing people who appear to do so is put in place that encourages us to call out people when a plausible, if perhaps unintended, interpretation of their words is that they judge people unfairly.
The solution of judging others favorably can’t survive as a meme by slapping down other modes of interpretation, if it tries it will be subverted, so it will take positive good will and praise, not condemnation, to spread it.
Item 2) deals with unknown unknowns, the argument from ignorance we tell ourselves. Smart people who are used to being right are vulnerable to not seriously realizing they might be wrong, or that though they can’t think of how something could be, it actually is.
To correct for that, I propose this.
Something somewhat similar to “This post, for instance, comes off as hostile and dismissive, not a message from someone who is sympathetic to the concerns expressed or willing to examine the matter under discussion. That’s probably not your intent?” could be an ideal. It might be productive if people were used to beginning certain posts with: here is what I think is the most likely interpretation, although this is not an accusation, because I also think other interpretations are fairly plausible given the context, how I usually agree with you, etc.