“Wrong, usually. The deeper, lonelier truth is that the “fragile angel” view doesn’t actually pay rent, and you do much better modeling other people as vicious reptilian warminds with transiently self-aware neocortices stapled on as an afterthought.”
This sort of mental exercise helped me. I read The Selfish Gene and changed my models of people. The replicators are just being themselves, and it drives behavior all the way up. In this sense, even the most personal rejection isn’t really that personal. Nothing is “wrong” with anybody. We are all just moving and living and being.
It is hard for a diehard romantic to accept this. But total betrayal by a loved one is brutal indeed. It’ll make you read books you never wanted to for fear it would spoil your romantic, fragile angel worldview.
This sort of mental exercise helped me. I read The Selfish Gene and changed my models of people. The replicators are just being themselves, and it drives behavior all the way up. In this sense, even the most personal rejection isn’t really that personal. Nothing is “wrong” with anybody. We are all just moving and living and being.
It is hard for a diehard romantic to accept this. But total betrayal by a loved one is brutal indeed. It’ll make you read books you never wanted to for fear it would spoil your romantic, fragile angel worldview.