I couldn’t find the original page I was getting those numbers from, but here’s another that gives a bit more granularity. It does seem like that 25% number interprets “sexual abuse” very broadly, but the more detailed numbers are still horrifying and still cause for alertness.
A last note: I agree that it is impossible to tell from a few hours of interaction whether someone will abuse your child. Many people can’t tell even after years of loving marriage whether their spouse will abuse their children, so “demonstrating acceptable qualities” is not a very good intervention. The absolute best defense against one’s children having unwanted/traumatic interactions is to tell them how to set boundaries, tell them to yell if they’re touched in a way they don’t want, tell them that their body is their own and that nobody gets to touch it without their permission. This has the virtue of defending against all manner of abuse and mistreatment, at the hands of parents, extended family, family friends and acquaintances alike.
Indeed, I didn’t say “this is a horrible idea, Alicorn.” I was just trying to mention this consideration, which I was a bit surprised not to see mentioned in the original post. If the children are all well-educated about how to respond to attempted abuse, and the adults all know this, a strongly abuse-deterring environment is created.
I couldn’t find the original page I was getting those numbers from, but here’s another that gives a bit more granularity. It does seem like that 25% number interprets “sexual abuse” very broadly, but the more detailed numbers are still horrifying and still cause for alertness.
Indeed, I didn’t say “this is a horrible idea, Alicorn.” I was just trying to mention this consideration, which I was a bit surprised not to see mentioned in the original post. If the children are all well-educated about how to respond to attempted abuse, and the adults all know this, a strongly abuse-deterring environment is created.