Puting this in a bad way, or provocative way, but underlying your description of love seems to be a “what’s in it for me” attitude. In other words, what I hear you saying about love is about you rather than about what you’re offering the other.
I agree with your presentation about true versus false and if we’re smitten by some image we’ve created in our own head, or bought into, that’s not likely to last or be all that healthy. But we also probably go through a stage in every relationship where the image in our head is not completely accurate and, in cases of relationships were trying to extend, err on the side of over assessment of the best in the person and under assessment of their flaws.
But at least for me, when thinking about love it’s more about the acceptance of an other with all their flaws and still wanting to be around them or give something of yourself to them and help and make their life better.
So, the idea of “true love”—which I don’t really believe in, or at least just see it as poetry—is more about that selfless giving than anything else. Exactly how well anyone can live that life everyday for someone else I’m not sure at all.
So I’d settle for practicle love which I’ll define as a two way street of mutual concern, compromise and tolerance with strong emotional attachments both selfish (want them in my life) and unselfish (want their life to be fulfilling and happy).
Puting this in a bad way, or provocative way, but underlying your description of love seems to be a “what’s in it for me” attitude. In other words, what I hear you saying about love is about you rather than about what you’re offering the other.
I agree with your presentation about true versus false and if we’re smitten by some image we’ve created in our own head, or bought into, that’s not likely to last or be all that healthy. But we also probably go through a stage in every relationship where the image in our head is not completely accurate and, in cases of relationships were trying to extend, err on the side of over assessment of the best in the person and under assessment of their flaws.
But at least for me, when thinking about love it’s more about the acceptance of an other with all their flaws and still wanting to be around them or give something of yourself to them and help and make their life better.
So, the idea of “true love”—which I don’t really believe in, or at least just see it as poetry—is more about that selfless giving than anything else. Exactly how well anyone can live that life everyday for someone else I’m not sure at all.
So I’d settle for practicle love which I’ll define as a two way street of mutual concern, compromise and tolerance with strong emotional attachments both selfish (want them in my life) and unselfish (want their life to be fulfilling and happy).