There is one boot process that works well, which is to contract an overseer. For me, it was my father. I felt embarrassed to be a grown adult asking for his father’s oversight, but it helped when I was at my worst. Now, I have him, my roommate, two ex-girlfriends, and my advisor who are all concerned about me and check up with me on a regular basis. I can be honest with them, and if I’ve stopped taking care of myself, they’ll call or even come over to drag me out of bed, feed me, and/or take me for a run.
I have periodically been an immense burden on the people who love me. However, I eventually came to the realization that being miserable, useless, and isolated was harder and more unpleasant for them than being let in on what was wrong with me and being asked to help. I’ve been a net negative to this world, but for some reason people still care for me, and as long as they do, my best course of action seems to be to let them try to help me. I suspect you have a set of people who would likewise prefer to help you than to watch you suffer.
Feeling less helpless was nearly as good for them as for me. I have a debt to them that I am continuing to increase, because I’m still not healthy or self-sufficient. I don’t know if I can ever repay it, but
Yes, I’ve considered that. There are people who can and do help, but not to the extent I’d need. I believe they help me as much as they can while still having a life that isn’t me. I shouldn’t ask for more, should I?
If you have tips for getting more efficient help out of them, suggestions of people who’d help though I don’t expect them to, or ways to get help from other people (professional caretakers?), by all means please shoot.
You indicated that you had trouble maintaining the behavior of getting daily morning light. Ask someone who 1) likes talking to you, 2) is generally up at that hour, and 3) is free to talk on the phone, to call you most mornings. They can set an alarm on their phone and have a 2 minute chat with you each day.
In my experience if I can pick up the phone (which admittedly can be difficult), the conversation is enough of a distraction and a motivation to get outside, and then inertia is enough to keep me out there.
The reason I chose my father is that he is an early riser, self-employed, and he would like to talk to me more than he gets to. You might not have someone like that in your life, but if you do, it is minimally intrusive to them, and may be a big help to you.
This sounds like a great idea. I have a strong impulse to answer phones, so if I put the phone far enough from my bed I had to get up to answer it, I’d get past the biggest obstacle.
There are two minor problems: None of the people I know have free time early in the morning, but two minutes is manageable. When outside, I’m not sure what to do so there’s a risk I’d get anxious and default to going home.
Seth found that his mood the next day was significantly improved if he saw enough faces the previous morning. There was a LessWronger that posted somewhere that this trick helped him a lot, but I can’t remember who or where right now.
I see quite a lot of faces in the morning already. Maybe not early enough? Though I’m pretty skeptical; it looks like it’d work best for extroverted neurotypicals, and I’m neither. I added it to the list of tricks, but I’ll try others first.
There is one boot process that works well, which is to contract an overseer. For me, it was my father. I felt embarrassed to be a grown adult asking for his father’s oversight, but it helped when I was at my worst. Now, I have him, my roommate, two ex-girlfriends, and my advisor who are all concerned about me and check up with me on a regular basis. I can be honest with them, and if I’ve stopped taking care of myself, they’ll call or even come over to drag me out of bed, feed me, and/or take me for a run.
I have periodically been an immense burden on the people who love me. However, I eventually came to the realization that being miserable, useless, and isolated was harder and more unpleasant for them than being let in on what was wrong with me and being asked to help. I’ve been a net negative to this world, but for some reason people still care for me, and as long as they do, my best course of action seems to be to let them try to help me. I suspect you have a set of people who would likewise prefer to help you than to watch you suffer.
Feeling less helpless was nearly as good for them as for me. I have a debt to them that I am continuing to increase, because I’m still not healthy or self-sufficient. I don’t know if I can ever repay it, but
Yes, I’ve considered that. There are people who can and do help, but not to the extent I’d need. I believe they help me as much as they can while still having a life that isn’t me. I shouldn’t ask for more, should I?
If you have tips for getting more efficient help out of them, suggestions of people who’d help though I don’t expect them to, or ways to get help from other people (professional caretakers?), by all means please shoot.
You indicated that you had trouble maintaining the behavior of getting daily morning light. Ask someone who 1) likes talking to you, 2) is generally up at that hour, and 3) is free to talk on the phone, to call you most mornings. They can set an alarm on their phone and have a 2 minute chat with you each day.
In my experience if I can pick up the phone (which admittedly can be difficult), the conversation is enough of a distraction and a motivation to get outside, and then inertia is enough to keep me out there.
The reason I chose my father is that he is an early riser, self-employed, and he would like to talk to me more than he gets to. You might not have someone like that in your life, but if you do, it is minimally intrusive to them, and may be a big help to you.
This sounds like a great idea. I have a strong impulse to answer phones, so if I put the phone far enough from my bed I had to get up to answer it, I’d get past the biggest obstacle.
There are two minor problems: None of the people I know have free time early in the morning, but two minutes is manageable. When outside, I’m not sure what to do so there’s a risk I’d get anxious and default to going home.
I’ll try it, thanks.
If you’re going to go to the trouble of talking to someone every morning, you might as well see their face:
http://www.blog.sethroberts.net/2009/10/15/more-about-faces-and-mood-2/
Seth found that his mood the next day was significantly improved if he saw enough faces the previous morning. There was a LessWronger that posted somewhere that this trick helped him a lot, but I can’t remember who or where right now.
I see quite a lot of faces in the morning already. Maybe not early enough? Though I’m pretty skeptical; it looks like it’d work best for extroverted neurotypicals, and I’m neither. I added it to the list of tricks, but I’ll try others first.