I tried to get one of my friends to read MoR and he quit after about Chapter 20 because he was getting annoyed at how the children weren’t acting like children. I think from his point of view, the disparity you’re identifying between Hermione and Harry, say, doesn’t count as mishandling Hermione so much as mishandling Harry… as far as my friend’s point of view is concerned, Hermione acting silly is a completely appropriate response to what she’s been through, and there is something deeply wrong with Harry Potter.
And… this is hard to talk about because I feel like I constantly have to make sure what I’m saying doesn’t count as Clueless Male Cluelessly Defending The Patriarchy. I have some small understanding of male privilege. It would be nice if I could be given the benefit of the doubt on this. (Now I’m trying to figure out if that counts as Clueless Male Cluelessly Defending The Patriarchy...)
And… this is hard to talk about because I feel like I constantly have to make sure what I’m saying doesn’t count as Clueless Male Cluelessly Defending The Patriarchy.
Don’t worry about it. Complaints about “Clueless Male Cluelessly Defending The Patriarchy” are mostly an excuse to enforce norms about things you can’t say.
I tried to get one of my friends to read MoR and he quit after about Chapter 20 because he was getting annoyed at how the children weren’t acting like children. I think from his point of view, the disparity you’re identifying between Hermione and Harry, say, doesn’t count as mishandling Hermione so much as mishandling Harry… as far as my friend’s point of view is concerned, Hermione acting silly is a completely appropriate response to what she’s been through, and there is something deeply wrong with Harry Potter.
And… this is hard to talk about because I feel like I constantly have to make sure what I’m saying doesn’t count as Clueless Male Cluelessly Defending The Patriarchy. I have some small understanding of male privilege. It would be nice if I could be given the benefit of the doubt on this. (Now I’m trying to figure out if that counts as Clueless Male Cluelessly Defending The Patriarchy...)
Don’t worry about it. Complaints about “Clueless Male Cluelessly Defending The Patriarchy” are mostly an excuse to enforce norms about things you can’t say.
Complaints about “things you can’t say” are mostly defenses of extortionate strategies in social relations.