I would first spend a bit of time familiarizing myself with the politics and religion of Rome (what gaps do I have in my modern knowledge?).
I would write a holy text claiming to be a divine revelation; it would be written on large tablets of aluminum (aluminum synthesis should be possible, and it is a plausible “unearthly material”; if my awesome knowledge makes it possible to make a metal that would be slightly more impressive or easier to make than aluminum, good). The front face would be readable etchings, but the back face would be usable for printing, so with a simple enough apparatus copies of the text could be easily created.
The text itself would be written in poetic Latin, claiming to be a revelation from a politically acceptable and “plausible” divinity, and saying nice things about the established Roman clergy (the goal isn’t to turn them against me), claiming that I am a special seer sent by the Gods. The text would also contain exhortations in various languages (in their own scripts) exhorting Hebrews, Persians, etc. to bow down before the might of the Romain Empire, it’s Law, and it’s Gods, presented in a non-insulting way (i.e. “Yahveh is Jupiter”, not “Abandon your Idols, Heathens!”).
The tablets would also contain relatively detailed maps of the world, and especially of the Mediterranean, as well as instructions on how to build more accurate astrolabes to find one’s way at sea. I would also introduce a system of decimal numerals, which makes calculations way easier than with roman numerals, as well explain useful things like double-entry bookkeeping, the principle of a joint-stock company, etc.
The tablets would also contain promises of everlasting life for those who worship the Gods the right way, as well as recommended rituals that may be slightly different from the established ones. There would be more detail on the afterlife, the bad things that will happen after death to those who do bad things (damage a copy of the tablets, disrespect a priest, kill a roman soldier, break Roman Law, etc.), and the good things that happen to those who do good things (copy the tablets, teach others about the new rituals, learn the new numerals, make offerings in the local temples, etc. Again, the goal is not to get in the way of the local religion, but to maximize memetic virulence. Some exhortations of how all will be equal in the afterlife could be good for appeal to the popular classes.
The tablets would be numbered to make it more likely that all are propagated together.
The tablets would also contain some esoteric nostradamus-like bullshit, as well as some encrypted stuff—well encrypted. Decrypted, it they would give instructions on how to read a hidden message in the whole tablets (like, for each page, follow the Fibonacci sequence (which would be explained in one of the tablets) to get a set of letters, cycle all those letters alphabetically), and the secret message would that oh in fact, the Gods want Emile to be the emperor, or they will rain fire upon the world. I would ideally have several secret messages encrypted through the tablets (some claiming the emperor is evil and needs to be overthrown, some claiming he needs to step down, some saying that now that he’s dead I should take his place, some saying that when the big volcano explodes in wherever it’s the sign that the end is near, etc.)
I wouldn’t claim to myself know about all those neat things—I would extract them from the tablets, after much time and effort—I’m not dangerous, I’m just a vessel! But through divine revelation I can interpret parts of the tablet, especially the nostradamus-y bits.
That should be sufficient for me to secure a safe and influential position in the official Roman Religion, surround myself with disciples to help me in my study. From then, the best course of action may be to isolate myself with devoted disciples in some mountain or something, show all signs of being inoffensive, “discover” the encrypted revelation that I am in fact the emperor, only show it to an inner circle of disciples, develop firearms, and either assassinate the emperor and take his place, or wait for him to die and reveal the revelation. That would also be the time to release an explanation of the decrypting method to the rest of the world, so that all those copies of the tablets become manifestos in my favor.
The firearms (and things like mustard gas, and whatever other military technology is possible) should be enough for a bunch of fanatics to hold the palace in case the army has objections, and once it is apparent that I have broad enough popular support because of the tablets, the rest of the Empire shouldn’t insist too much and accept me as emperor.
Some refinements, after reading other ideas in this thread:
Split the work into several books: one targeting merchants and navigators, one targeting scholars and lawyers, one targeting priests, one targeting noble families, one targeting plebians, a secret one targeting the army, etc. (the details could vary depending on which targets are the most valuable) The books would reference each other (except the military one) as a marketing ploy.
The secret military book would be written in an alternate alphabet (simple replacement of letters with strange symbols as a low form of security), and include instructions on some military technology: crossbows, composite bows, stirrups, better steel, secret codes and how to break them, the tactical implications of the new technology, etc. - the goal is to allow the Roman Army to develop new technology and have the time to perfect it before knowledge of it becomes widespread (unlike the other books, divulging the content of this book to unroman ears would get punishment in the afterlife). This should help the army be more supportive of the new ideas introduced by the books in general, and thus of my eventual claim to the throne.
Antibiotics! Also, proper washing of hands by the doctors should be among the religious commandments; the book on medicine should include an explanation of microbes, sterilization and other useful concepts, and describe ways to experimentally test those theories.
The messages aiming to be broadcast to the foreign heathens could go along with Latin translations of those texts, as well as explanation of what valuable goods those people are likely to hold, and what they are likely to value, giving an incentive to merchants to try to reach India or even China.
The book aimed at the noble families could include well-written adaptations of the stories of Hamlet, Romeo and Juliet, etc. but cast in a distant semi-mythical past where the main characters are presented as ancestors of those noble families—that would boost the prestige of those families and have them as promoters of the new books as obviously divinely inspired.
The horse collar, of course!
Together, those should ensure some support support from the clergy, the army, the merchants and the noble families.
Do I have to take it over? Can I not just use my body of knowledge to churn out technology and Enlightened thought to (hopefully) allow humanity to skip a couple hundred years’ worth of religious intolerance, and ignorance of rational thought?
some saying that when the big volcano explodes in wherever it’s the sign that the end is near
Huh, you’d be very unlikely to make it to AD 79 anyway. (On the other hand, tectonics might (or might not) be chaotic enough that what you do might advance (or delay) the eruption.)
Hm. 1 AD and Christianity is on the rise. That’s one of the prime reasons I didn’t want to start a new religion. Sounds like a good way to get yourself killed. See also: Jesus. Jesus threatened the power structure of Rome and didn’t get much for it...
Imperial Rome was in general extremely tolerant of new religions, of which there were many new mystery cults—as long as they accepted a few ground rules vis-a-vis politics, and even those ground rules were negotiable. For example, the Jews were allowed to break all sorts of rules like not sacrificing to the emperors or ejecting legion standards from the Temple. As far as we can tell given the sources available (which likely skew pro-Roman), the Jewish revolts were not really the Romans’ fault.
That’s right, and that’s also probably why Christianity grew extremely slowly early on. (I wouldn’t go the religion route myself unless I had technological miracles to employ.)
People have speculated about that for a long time. Relevant factors seem to be the decay of the Roman military discrediting Christianity’s major rival, Mithraism, lack of vitality in the pagan faiths such as diminished oracular activity discrediting them (‘the silence of the oracles’), and good political luck.
Who are you going to alienate by starting a new religion? No one unless you choose to. (Even the intolerant Hebrew scriptures were respected among the pagans by virtue of their antiquity, and this was a big selling point for the many fellow-traveler non-Jew Jews, if you will, and for the later Christians.)
But did the Hebrew’s respect the pagans? Religion is mindkilling, and anyone who ascribes to another one is going to be less fond of you. At least that’s what I was thinking.
Did they all? Who knows. Xenophobia is universal. We do know there were instances and veins of respect for some pagans who did not go so far as to convert & be circumcised. If they were ‘righteous’, which entailed following the basic moral code, they might even avoid Gehenna.
Fun game!
I would go the Joseph Smith x Christianity route:
I would first spend a bit of time familiarizing myself with the politics and religion of Rome (what gaps do I have in my modern knowledge?).
I would write a holy text claiming to be a divine revelation; it would be written on large tablets of aluminum (aluminum synthesis should be possible, and it is a plausible “unearthly material”; if my awesome knowledge makes it possible to make a metal that would be slightly more impressive or easier to make than aluminum, good). The front face would be readable etchings, but the back face would be usable for printing, so with a simple enough apparatus copies of the text could be easily created.
The text itself would be written in poetic Latin, claiming to be a revelation from a politically acceptable and “plausible” divinity, and saying nice things about the established Roman clergy (the goal isn’t to turn them against me), claiming that I am a special seer sent by the Gods. The text would also contain exhortations in various languages (in their own scripts) exhorting Hebrews, Persians, etc. to bow down before the might of the Romain Empire, it’s Law, and it’s Gods, presented in a non-insulting way (i.e. “Yahveh is Jupiter”, not “Abandon your Idols, Heathens!”).
The tablets would also contain relatively detailed maps of the world, and especially of the Mediterranean, as well as instructions on how to build more accurate astrolabes to find one’s way at sea. I would also introduce a system of decimal numerals, which makes calculations way easier than with roman numerals, as well explain useful things like double-entry bookkeeping, the principle of a joint-stock company, etc.
The tablets would also contain promises of everlasting life for those who worship the Gods the right way, as well as recommended rituals that may be slightly different from the established ones. There would be more detail on the afterlife, the bad things that will happen after death to those who do bad things (damage a copy of the tablets, disrespect a priest, kill a roman soldier, break Roman Law, etc.), and the good things that happen to those who do good things (copy the tablets, teach others about the new rituals, learn the new numerals, make offerings in the local temples, etc. Again, the goal is not to get in the way of the local religion, but to maximize memetic virulence. Some exhortations of how all will be equal in the afterlife could be good for appeal to the popular classes.
The tablets would be numbered to make it more likely that all are propagated together.
The tablets would also contain some esoteric nostradamus-like bullshit, as well as some encrypted stuff—well encrypted. Decrypted, it they would give instructions on how to read a hidden message in the whole tablets (like, for each page, follow the Fibonacci sequence (which would be explained in one of the tablets) to get a set of letters, cycle all those letters alphabetically), and the secret message would that oh in fact, the Gods want Emile to be the emperor, or they will rain fire upon the world. I would ideally have several secret messages encrypted through the tablets (some claiming the emperor is evil and needs to be overthrown, some claiming he needs to step down, some saying that now that he’s dead I should take his place, some saying that when the big volcano explodes in wherever it’s the sign that the end is near, etc.)
I wouldn’t claim to myself know about all those neat things—I would extract them from the tablets, after much time and effort—I’m not dangerous, I’m just a vessel! But through divine revelation I can interpret parts of the tablet, especially the nostradamus-y bits.
That should be sufficient for me to secure a safe and influential position in the official Roman Religion, surround myself with disciples to help me in my study. From then, the best course of action may be to isolate myself with devoted disciples in some mountain or something, show all signs of being inoffensive, “discover” the encrypted revelation that I am in fact the emperor, only show it to an inner circle of disciples, develop firearms, and either assassinate the emperor and take his place, or wait for him to die and reveal the revelation. That would also be the time to release an explanation of the decrypting method to the rest of the world, so that all those copies of the tablets become manifestos in my favor.
The firearms (and things like mustard gas, and whatever other military technology is possible) should be enough for a bunch of fanatics to hold the palace in case the army has objections, and once it is apparent that I have broad enough popular support because of the tablets, the rest of the Empire shouldn’t insist too much and accept me as emperor.
Some refinements, after reading other ideas in this thread:
Split the work into several books: one targeting merchants and navigators, one targeting scholars and lawyers, one targeting priests, one targeting noble families, one targeting plebians, a secret one targeting the army, etc. (the details could vary depending on which targets are the most valuable) The books would reference each other (except the military one) as a marketing ploy.
The secret military book would be written in an alternate alphabet (simple replacement of letters with strange symbols as a low form of security), and include instructions on some military technology: crossbows, composite bows, stirrups, better steel, secret codes and how to break them, the tactical implications of the new technology, etc. - the goal is to allow the Roman Army to develop new technology and have the time to perfect it before knowledge of it becomes widespread (unlike the other books, divulging the content of this book to unroman ears would get punishment in the afterlife). This should help the army be more supportive of the new ideas introduced by the books in general, and thus of my eventual claim to the throne.
Antibiotics! Also, proper washing of hands by the doctors should be among the religious commandments; the book on medicine should include an explanation of microbes, sterilization and other useful concepts, and describe ways to experimentally test those theories.
The messages aiming to be broadcast to the foreign heathens could go along with Latin translations of those texts, as well as explanation of what valuable goods those people are likely to hold, and what they are likely to value, giving an incentive to merchants to try to reach India or even China.
The book aimed at the noble families could include well-written adaptations of the stories of Hamlet, Romeo and Juliet, etc. but cast in a distant semi-mythical past where the main characters are presented as ancestors of those noble families—that would boost the prestige of those families and have them as promoters of the new books as obviously divinely inspired.
The horse collar, of course!
Together, those should ensure some support support from the clergy, the army, the merchants and the noble families.
Do I have to take it over? Can I not just use my body of knowledge to churn out technology and Enlightened thought to (hopefully) allow humanity to skip a couple hundred years’ worth of religious intolerance, and ignorance of rational thought?
Huh, you’d be very unlikely to make it to AD 79 anyway. (On the other hand, tectonics might (or might not) be chaotic enough that what you do might advance (or delay) the eruption.)
Hm. 1 AD and Christianity is on the rise. That’s one of the prime reasons I didn’t want to start a new religion. Sounds like a good way to get yourself killed. See also: Jesus. Jesus threatened the power structure of Rome and didn’t get much for it...
Imperial Rome was in general extremely tolerant of new religions, of which there were many new mystery cults—as long as they accepted a few ground rules vis-a-vis politics, and even those ground rules were negotiable. For example, the Jews were allowed to break all sorts of rules like not sacrificing to the emperors or ejecting legion standards from the Temple. As far as we can tell given the sources available (which likely skew pro-Roman), the Jewish revolts were not really the Romans’ fault.
This also means that there was intense competition among religions which would reduce the chance that any one religion could gain adherents.
On the other hand, a printing press is an enormous advantage for spreading memes.
That’s right, and that’s also probably why Christianity grew extremely slowly early on. (I wouldn’t go the religion route myself unless I had technological miracles to employ.)
I wonder why Christianity won so big in the end then, given that it wasn’t displaying early memetic virulence.
People have speculated about that for a long time. Relevant factors seem to be the decay of the Roman military discrediting Christianity’s major rival, Mithraism, lack of vitality in the pagan faiths such as diminished oracular activity discrediting them (‘the silence of the oracles’), and good political luck.
My point is more that you’re instantly going to alienate a great number of people and make things much, much harder for you.
Who are you going to alienate by starting a new religion? No one unless you choose to. (Even the intolerant Hebrew scriptures were respected among the pagans by virtue of their antiquity, and this was a big selling point for the many fellow-traveler non-Jew Jews, if you will, and for the later Christians.)
But did the Hebrew’s respect the pagans? Religion is mindkilling, and anyone who ascribes to another one is going to be less fond of you. At least that’s what I was thinking.
Did they all? Who knows. Xenophobia is universal. We do know there were instances and veins of respect for some pagans who did not go so far as to convert & be circumcised. If they were ‘righteous’, which entailed following the basic moral code, they might even avoid Gehenna.
Jesus (if he existed at all) was probably about 5 at that point. He won’t causing trouble for another three decades.
Oh duh. I’m remembering a cached thought that I’d already heard was wrong that there were 20-whatever years between 0 A.D. and 1 A.D.
Not at all. Many decades later.
EDIT: I didn’t see the MileyCyrus’ post which asserts the same.