Not to put too fine a point on it: through the tone and content of the post, I can still see the old attachments and subconscious messed-up strategies shining through.
I am, of course, not free of blame here because the same could be said about my comment.
However, I reach out over both of these and touch you, Val.
[Note: you post is intentionally poetic, so I’ll let myself be intentionally poetic while answering this:]
The correct answer is, I think, “don’t care”. On Friday night you dance with a Gervais-sociopath. On Saturday you build a moon rocket together and use it to pick up groceries. Do you “trust” the rocket to be “good”? No, but you don’t need to.