In the last meetup I went to, there was an obnoxious guy who was dominating the conversation, and somehow got into a relativism-based defense of something, I think just to be contrary.
Several other people jumped on him at this point, and soon the argument swung around to “what about torture? what if you were being tortured?” and he came up with rationalizations about how what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, it’d be a great story, etc. etc., and so they kept piling on qualifications, saying “they torture you for 50 years and then execute you and you have no hope of rescue and blah blah blah”, trying to nail down boards over every possible ray of sunshine.
And of course even then, rationalizations were found, and his girlfriend took up the contrarian standard and soliloquized about how she was a survivor of a suicide attempt and believed it was always better to choose life, no matter how painful, and the other participants responded by cranking up the torture even further.
Did anything remotely productive come out of this? No, of course not. It was ugly, it was pointless, and frankly it was embarrassing to be a part of. I left.
I question whether I’m the screwed up one for not swallowing my alienation to this kind of behavior.
It wasn’t just one person, it was three or four. And it wasn’t just that they INVOKED torture, it was that they clung to it like a life preserver, like it was the magic ingredient for winning the argument.
This is so far outside the bounds of civil discourse, and yet it’s routine in this community. I don’t think it’s unwarranted to be generally concerned.