I think all of this is fairly important—if you’re like me, you’ve likely made some mistakes along these lines.
Can you give some examples of specific mistakes you made or you observed others make? Have you observed me making any such mistakes? I ask because there’s a lot of rather abstract arguments in this post and I’m not sure if it’s worth the effort to think carefully about them to try to figure out if they apply to me. It seems like giving more concrete examples would help others who might have this reaction to your post too.
Thinking up actual historical examples is hard for me. The following is mostly true, partly made up.
(#4) I don’t necessarily have trouble talking about my emotions, but when there are any clear incentives for me to make particular claims, I tend to shut down. It feels viscerally dishonest (at least sometimes) to say things, particularly positive things, which I have an incentive to say. For example, responding “it’s good to see you too” in response to “it’s good to see you” sometimes (not always) feels dishonest even when true.
(#4) Talking about money with an employer feels very difficult, in a way that’s related to intuitively discarding any motivated arguments and expecting others to do the same.
(#6) I’m not sure if I was at the party, but I am generally in the crowd Grognor was talking about, and very likely engaged in similar behavior to what he describes.
(#5) I have tripped up when trying to explain something because I noticed myself reaching for examples to prove my point, and the “cherry-picking” alarm went off.
(#5, #4) I have noticed that a friend was selecting arguments that I should go to the movies with him in a biased way which ignored arguments to the contrary, and ‘shut down’ in the conversation (become noncommittal / slightly unresponsive).
(#3) I have thought in mistaken ways which would have accepted modest-epistemology arguments, when thinking about decision theory.
Can you give some examples of specific mistakes you made or you observed others make? Have you observed me making any such mistakes? I ask because there’s a lot of rather abstract arguments in this post and I’m not sure if it’s worth the effort to think carefully about them to try to figure out if they apply to me. It seems like giving more concrete examples would help others who might have this reaction to your post too.
Thinking up actual historical examples is hard for me. The following is mostly true, partly made up.
(#4) I don’t necessarily have trouble talking about my emotions, but when there are any clear incentives for me to make particular claims, I tend to shut down. It feels viscerally dishonest (at least sometimes) to say things, particularly positive things, which I have an incentive to say. For example, responding “it’s good to see you too” in response to “it’s good to see you” sometimes (not always) feels dishonest even when true.
(#4) Talking about money with an employer feels very difficult, in a way that’s related to intuitively discarding any motivated arguments and expecting others to do the same.
(#6) I’m not sure if I was at the party, but I am generally in the crowd Grognor was talking about, and very likely engaged in similar behavior to what he describes.
(#5) I have tripped up when trying to explain something because I noticed myself reaching for examples to prove my point, and the “cherry-picking” alarm went off.
(#5, #4) I have noticed that a friend was selecting arguments that I should go to the movies with him in a biased way which ignored arguments to the contrary, and ‘shut down’ in the conversation (become noncommittal / slightly unresponsive).
(#3) I have thought in mistaken ways which would have accepted modest-epistemology arguments, when thinking about decision theory.