Well, I can’t help having some story about myself, and I do feel happier when it’s a positive story. I’d be surprised if there are people who don’t feel that way. But at the same time, I know from experience that the stories I tell myself are mostly made up, and whenever they become counterproductive, I can just rewrite them with no hard feelings. Does that makes sense?
Thanks! I’m pretty sure I understand the broad strokes you’ve given about how you think/feel on this, and I’d be interested about prying into the details.
Are these rewrites little corrective tweaks that you do fairly quickly, or are they more drawn out processes that you need to devote time to?
Were there any particular experiences that hammered in “these stories are mostly made up”?
I’m guessing from what you’ve said that it doesn’t bother you that your stories are made up. Can you talk about why that doesn’t bother you, or why you think it might bother other people, and why those reasons don’t apply to you? (I know questions like “why doesn’t ____ bother you?” are weird and hard to answer, so answer however you like)
I guess I simply noticed that when I spend a lot of time and attention on something, it becomes important to me.
For example, as a Russian person living abroad, I can choose every day to either read Russian domestic news or abstain. If I spend a few days reading news, they start feeling important to my life and kinda unpleasant. Then I stop and it fades away again.
So more generally, when something “meaningful” is making me miserable, I can spend time on something else, knowing that soon enough it will be the new “meaningful” thing. Sometimes it’s hard, if I’m very locked in to the old thing, but I’ve been in that situation many times (miserable about something that feels super important in the moment) and it does get a bit easier with experience.
Well, I can’t help having some story about myself, and I do feel happier when it’s a positive story. I’d be surprised if there are people who don’t feel that way. But at the same time, I know from experience that the stories I tell myself are mostly made up, and whenever they become counterproductive, I can just rewrite them with no hard feelings. Does that makes sense?
Thanks! I’m pretty sure I understand the broad strokes you’ve given about how you think/feel on this, and I’d be interested about prying into the details.
Are these rewrites little corrective tweaks that you do fairly quickly, or are they more drawn out processes that you need to devote time to?
Were there any particular experiences that hammered in “these stories are mostly made up”?
I’m guessing from what you’ve said that it doesn’t bother you that your stories are made up. Can you talk about why that doesn’t bother you, or why you think it might bother other people, and why those reasons don’t apply to you? (I know questions like “why doesn’t ____ bother you?” are weird and hard to answer, so answer however you like)
I guess I simply noticed that when I spend a lot of time and attention on something, it becomes important to me.
For example, as a Russian person living abroad, I can choose every day to either read Russian domestic news or abstain. If I spend a few days reading news, they start feeling important to my life and kinda unpleasant. Then I stop and it fades away again.
So more generally, when something “meaningful” is making me miserable, I can spend time on something else, knowing that soon enough it will be the new “meaningful” thing. Sometimes it’s hard, if I’m very locked in to the old thing, but I’ve been in that situation many times (miserable about something that feels super important in the moment) and it does get a bit easier with experience.