One notable aspect in my experience with this is that exhaustion is not exclusively a function of the decision’s complexity. I can experience exhaustion when deciding what to eat for dinner, for instance, even though I’ve made similar decisions literally thousands of times before, the answer is always obvious (cook stuff I have at home or order from a restaurant I like—what else is there?), and the stakes are low (“had I given it more thought, I would have realize I was more in the mood for soup than a sandwich” is not exactly a harrowing loss).
Another aspect to note is that decisions that end up exhausting me usually entail doing work I don’t want to do. I never get exhausted when deciding where to hike, for instance, because no matter what I know I will enjoy myself, even if one spot requires a long drive, or inconvenient preparations, or whatever. One possibility is that part of me recognizes that the correct decision will inevitably cause me to do work I don’t want to do. Actually deciding sets whatever work I have to do into motion while “deliberating” endlessly lets me put it off, which might end up feeling internally like the decision is hard to make. A motivated mind is great at coming up with bogus reasons for why an obvious decision is not so obvious.
A key insight for me was recognizing that my reluctance to do work is pretty directly proportional to what I expect the value of its product to be, biased towards short term gains unless I explicitly visualize the long term consequences. If realizing that the best decision for dinner is to cook, and that reminds me that I need to do dishes and chop vegetables and clean the stove, etc. etc. then I have a hard time “deciding” that cooking is the way to go because it implies that in the short term, I will be less happy than I am currently. If I think about the scenario where I procrastinate and don’t cook, and focus on how hungry I will be and how unpleasant that feeling is, then my exhaustion often fades and the decision becomes clearer.
One notable aspect in my experience with this is that exhaustion is not exclusively a function of the decision’s complexity. I can experience exhaustion when deciding what to eat for dinner, for instance, even though I’ve made similar decisions literally thousands of times before, the answer is always obvious (cook stuff I have at home or order from a restaurant I like—what else is there?), and the stakes are low (“had I given it more thought, I would have realize I was more in the mood for soup than a sandwich” is not exactly a harrowing loss).
Another aspect to note is that decisions that end up exhausting me usually entail doing work I don’t want to do. I never get exhausted when deciding where to hike, for instance, because no matter what I know I will enjoy myself, even if one spot requires a long drive, or inconvenient preparations, or whatever. One possibility is that part of me recognizes that the correct decision will inevitably cause me to do work I don’t want to do. Actually deciding sets whatever work I have to do into motion while “deliberating” endlessly lets me put it off, which might end up feeling internally like the decision is hard to make. A motivated mind is great at coming up with bogus reasons for why an obvious decision is not so obvious.
A key insight for me was recognizing that my reluctance to do work is pretty directly proportional to what I expect the value of its product to be, biased towards short term gains unless I explicitly visualize the long term consequences. If realizing that the best decision for dinner is to cook, and that reminds me that I need to do dishes and chop vegetables and clean the stove, etc. etc. then I have a hard time “deciding” that cooking is the way to go because it implies that in the short term, I will be less happy than I am currently. If I think about the scenario where I procrastinate and don’t cook, and focus on how hungry I will be and how unpleasant that feeling is, then my exhaustion often fades and the decision becomes clearer.