Thanks for the information, I appreciate more statistics on it.
Lately I’ve been calling for a right-wing neovictorian form of feminism. The party culture that I witnessed at college seemed designed to put women in a compromising position: black out drunk, scantily clad, in a fraternity house. The sole attempt at sexual assault prevention is shaming sober males. Questioning the whole culture is never done, since “sexual liberation” is also part of feminism. But it really doesn’t seem in women’s interest.
I read a rape confession thread on reddit once and I was struck by how most of the men deeply regretted their actions and how some had even had their lives destroyed by it. Many of them got into bed drunk and horny with a woman in the same state before she withdrew consent. Few were without remorse.
Following up on your article, I think we should tell girls that 2/3rds of women are raped while they are intoxicated. But feminists would never stand for it. They believe that they have the right to make themselves drunk and vulnerable without being raped. And of course they do—but rights are flimsy things when you’re counting on them for protection.
I also have the right to leave an iPad out on my carseat in downtown SF without having my car broken into. But I don’t insist on my right the way feminists do.
Thanks for sharing this, that is an interesting data point.
A question that immediately pops to mind which cannot be answered with current information as I know it, is are these men who confessed representative of the majority of men who rape, or one subset? For example, in the study cited, while most rapes were done by repeat rapists, there were still many who did only do it once—this scenario seems most likely to me coming from that population.
On the other hand, I’ve been a domestic violence counselor, and I know “the cycle of violence,” where an apologetic phase is part of a cycle that happens over and over. http://www.domesticviolence.org/cycle-of-violence/. From my training, we were told that men who do this almost never change, and that while they will go through this phase of remorse, that counseling almost never works to get them to stop cycling back to the behavior considered abusive. I don’t know if any advancements have been made on that front since my training, which was several years ago. So anyway, if the cycle of violence which goes on in domestic violence between couples applies to the repeat rapists, then it would make sense that they would express remorse.
Making a separate reply so you get an orange envelope. I just reread this, and it isn’t really conducive to summarization. I’d read the whole thing, it’s worth it. It’s what got me to really start noticing subtle rationalizations and subtle avoidant behaviors in myself and others.
http://thelastpsychiatrist.com/2012/06/amy_schumer_offers_you_a_look.html
Placeholder, cant post efficiently from phone. A fascinating foray into the apology phase by The Last Psychiatrist, I’ll post a link and summary later when able.
Thanks for the information, I appreciate more statistics on it.
Lately I’ve been calling for a right-wing neovictorian form of feminism. The party culture that I witnessed at college seemed designed to put women in a compromising position: black out drunk, scantily clad, in a fraternity house. The sole attempt at sexual assault prevention is shaming sober males. Questioning the whole culture is never done, since “sexual liberation” is also part of feminism. But it really doesn’t seem in women’s interest.
I read a rape confession thread on reddit once and I was struck by how most of the men deeply regretted their actions and how some had even had their lives destroyed by it. Many of them got into bed drunk and horny with a woman in the same state before she withdrew consent. Few were without remorse.
Following up on your article, I think we should tell girls that 2/3rds of women are raped while they are intoxicated. But feminists would never stand for it. They believe that they have the right to make themselves drunk and vulnerable without being raped. And of course they do—but rights are flimsy things when you’re counting on them for protection.
I also have the right to leave an iPad out on my carseat in downtown SF without having my car broken into. But I don’t insist on my right the way feminists do.
Thanks for sharing this, that is an interesting data point.
A question that immediately pops to mind which cannot be answered with current information as I know it, is are these men who confessed representative of the majority of men who rape, or one subset? For example, in the study cited, while most rapes were done by repeat rapists, there were still many who did only do it once—this scenario seems most likely to me coming from that population.
On the other hand, I’ve been a domestic violence counselor, and I know “the cycle of violence,” where an apologetic phase is part of a cycle that happens over and over. http://www.domesticviolence.org/cycle-of-violence/. From my training, we were told that men who do this almost never change, and that while they will go through this phase of remorse, that counseling almost never works to get them to stop cycling back to the behavior considered abusive. I don’t know if any advancements have been made on that front since my training, which was several years ago. So anyway, if the cycle of violence which goes on in domestic violence between couples applies to the repeat rapists, then it would make sense that they would express remorse.
Making a separate reply so you get an orange envelope. I just reread this, and it isn’t really conducive to summarization. I’d read the whole thing, it’s worth it. It’s what got me to really start noticing subtle rationalizations and subtle avoidant behaviors in myself and others. http://thelastpsychiatrist.com/2012/06/amy_schumer_offers_you_a_look.html
Placeholder, cant post efficiently from phone. A fascinating foray into the apology phase by The Last Psychiatrist, I’ll post a link and summary later when able.