On my first draft of something significant, I don’t even worry about style—I concentrate on getting my actual content down on paper in some kind of sensible form. I don’t worry about the style because I have more than enough problems getting the content right.
In this first draft, I think about structure. What ONE thing am I trying to say? What are the 2-5 sub-points of that one thing? Do these sub-points have any sub-points? Make a tree structure, and if you can’t identify the trunk, go away until you can.
Then I go back and fix it. Because the content is now in roughly the right place, the second run-through is much easier. But normally that helpful first draft is full of areas where the logical flow can be improved, and the English can be tightened up. I think you’re missing this stage out entirely as when looking at your post I can find plenty to do. Here’s what five minutes of such attention does to your first para.
“When I was 12 I started an email correspondence with a cousin, and we joked and talked about the things going on in our lives. This went on for years. One day, several years in, I read through the archives. It saturated my mind with the details of my life back then. I had the surreal feeling of having traveled back in time—almost becoming again the person I was years ago, with all my old feelings, hopes and concerns.”
Keep at it—there’s plenty enough there for the polishing to be worthwhile.
Here’s what I tend to do.
On my first draft of something significant, I don’t even worry about style—I concentrate on getting my actual content down on paper in some kind of sensible form. I don’t worry about the style because I have more than enough problems getting the content right.
In this first draft, I think about structure. What ONE thing am I trying to say? What are the 2-5 sub-points of that one thing? Do these sub-points have any sub-points? Make a tree structure, and if you can’t identify the trunk, go away until you can.
Then I go back and fix it. Because the content is now in roughly the right place, the second run-through is much easier. But normally that helpful first draft is full of areas where the logical flow can be improved, and the English can be tightened up. I think you’re missing this stage out entirely as when looking at your post I can find plenty to do. Here’s what five minutes of such attention does to your first para.
“When I was 12 I started an email correspondence with a cousin, and we joked and talked about the things going on in our lives. This went on for years. One day, several years in, I read through the archives. It saturated my mind with the details of my life back then. I had the surreal feeling of having traveled back in time—almost becoming again the person I was years ago, with all my old feelings, hopes and concerns.”
Keep at it—there’s plenty enough there for the polishing to be worthwhile.