I wasn’t expecting this response from you. Thank you, I am truly grateful for you sharing this with me. It is definitely a gift I will treasure, and it is also something I can work with more easily.
I am more of an intuitive person. Reading psychology, sociology, social sciences and experimental ideas/theories, and a lot of fiction and mind-boggling film. I am prone to reflecting, and delving into introspection, self-understanding and communication, societal and relational understandings. I haven’t read that much, but I have talked and delved deep into the nitty-gritty of my own and the psyche’s of other people. And, from that discovery, I started to notice, ever slowly, that I didn’t like to focus on the bad, the ugly and the dirty, below a certain threshold.
Which simply means, I am not able to handle a fundamental part of reality, but it didn’t bug me that much, as I similarly to you, grew up with ideals like the Phantom; simple good against bad—and the Bible. As I got older, things got more complex, but I held on to this belief that I could find some kind of level of complexity or abstraction, where my actions, thoughts or inner changes would matter sufficiently to seem to warrant the effort.
And, to my dismay, I had to accept that I was chasing my own tail. To follow that line of thinking would never end, I would forever try to force complexity inside my simple box of reality, and the effort would just strain me and not really bring me forward. Even though I can easily imagine and hold things lightly, I don’t go beyond a certain limit—some kind of mind-speed limitor, a reminder that “I’m not there yet”, or “a lot of things are missing before it would make sense to look at these issues”.
I did however meet someone that I acknowledged as an equal in their pursuit of making sense of things, and at that point many things clicked in place for me. Much of the reason I have in the last years radically changed a lot of my views about things, is because I through my partner have been confronted with an understanding of the world that was so different from my own—but that was similarly well-founded—that I had to either ignore it or try to widen the box and include many of the elements I had previously disregarded, dismissed or simplified nearly out of existence. And I wasn’t going to let this opportunity pass me by.
I find some solace in imagining having different Cognitive functions/People in my mind, like a team or something—all with different ways of seeing the world, that dig out different data and even interprets that data differently. The reason I do this is not because I like to make things overly complicated, but that I have simply found no better practical explanation for how radically different these parts of the psyche interact with and view the world. Their increased cooperation, has taken me and us to places where we are regularly confronted by many sets of opposites and dichotomies that are seemingly diametrically opposed, that somehow still fit together and can create new options and directions.
As with many things, it isn’t quite easy to translate this back the other way around, to simplify the complex. I can drive a bike, but I can’t really explain how. Or, when I start to delve seriously into how I drive a bike, all the nuances and details, depending on how far I take it, it might end up as hard because of the opposite problem, that there is too much information for it to be divulged easily.
With regard to your choice on how to interact with the future, I also see entirely different options entirely. And I don’t like to dismiss them, even when it hurts to feel or look at. But I am averse to sharing them directly, and I am trying to backtrack to somewhere where I can talk and express things without getting lost in the myriad of interconnected parts, a place where it can be explained more coherently and easy to follow.
Asking this question is part of it. But this isn’t where I’m at, it is simply the intersection point where I can talk about something without veering totally of course—I hoped :)
I wasn’t expecting this response from you. Thank you, I am truly grateful for you sharing this with me. It is definitely a gift I will treasure, and it is also something I can work with more easily.
I am more of an intuitive person. Reading psychology, sociology, social sciences and experimental ideas/theories, and a lot of fiction and mind-boggling film. I am prone to reflecting, and delving into introspection, self-understanding and communication, societal and relational understandings. I haven’t read that much, but I have talked and delved deep into the nitty-gritty of my own and the psyche’s of other people. And, from that discovery, I started to notice, ever slowly, that I didn’t like to focus on the bad, the ugly and the dirty, below a certain threshold.
Which simply means, I am not able to handle a fundamental part of reality, but it didn’t bug me that much, as I similarly to you, grew up with ideals like the Phantom; simple good against bad—and the Bible. As I got older, things got more complex, but I held on to this belief that I could find some kind of level of complexity or abstraction, where my actions, thoughts or inner changes would matter sufficiently to seem to warrant the effort.
And, to my dismay, I had to accept that I was chasing my own tail. To follow that line of thinking would never end, I would forever try to force complexity inside my simple box of reality, and the effort would just strain me and not really bring me forward. Even though I can easily imagine and hold things lightly, I don’t go beyond a certain limit—some kind of mind-speed limitor, a reminder that “I’m not there yet”, or “a lot of things are missing before it would make sense to look at these issues”.
I did however meet someone that I acknowledged as an equal in their pursuit of making sense of things, and at that point many things clicked in place for me. Much of the reason I have in the last years radically changed a lot of my views about things, is because I through my partner have been confronted with an understanding of the world that was so different from my own—but that was similarly well-founded—that I had to either ignore it or try to widen the box and include many of the elements I had previously disregarded, dismissed or simplified nearly out of existence. And I wasn’t going to let this opportunity pass me by.
I find some solace in imagining having different Cognitive functions/People in my mind, like a team or something—all with different ways of seeing the world, that dig out different data and even interprets that data differently. The reason I do this is not because I like to make things overly complicated, but that I have simply found no better practical explanation for how radically different these parts of the psyche interact with and view the world. Their increased cooperation, has taken me and us to places where we are regularly confronted by many sets of opposites and dichotomies that are seemingly diametrically opposed, that somehow still fit together and can create new options and directions.
As with many things, it isn’t quite easy to translate this back the other way around, to simplify the complex. I can drive a bike, but I can’t really explain how. Or, when I start to delve seriously into how I drive a bike, all the nuances and details, depending on how far I take it, it might end up as hard because of the opposite problem, that there is too much information for it to be divulged easily.
With regard to your choice on how to interact with the future, I also see entirely different options entirely. And I don’t like to dismiss them, even when it hurts to feel or look at. But I am averse to sharing them directly, and I am trying to backtrack to somewhere where I can talk and express things without getting lost in the myriad of interconnected parts, a place where it can be explained more coherently and easy to follow.
Asking this question is part of it. But this isn’t where I’m at, it is simply the intersection point where I can talk about something without veering totally of course—I hoped :)
Kindly,
Caerulea-Lawrence