This content was moved from the main body of the post to this comment. After receiving some good feedback, I’ve decided I’ll follow the template of “advice section in comments” for most of my posts.
Some Quick Advice
Awareness
See if you can notice conversational cultures/styles which match what I’ve described.
Begin noticing if you lean towards a particular style.
Begin paying attention to whether those you discuss with might have a particular style, especially if it’s different from yours.
Start determining if different groups you’re a member of, e.g. clubs or workplaces, lean in one cultural direction or another.
Openness
Reflect on the advantages that cultures/styles different to your own have and others might use them instead.
Consider that on some occasions styles different to yours might be more appropriate.
Don’t assume that alternatives to your own culture are obviously wrong, stupid, bad, or lacking in skills.
Experimentation
Push yourself a little in the direction of adopting a non-default style for you. Perhaps you already do but push yourself a little more. Try doing so and feeling comfortable and open, if possible.
Ideal and Degenerate Forms of Each Culture
Unsurprisingly, each of the cultures has their advantages and weaknesses, mostly to do with when and where they’re most effective. I hope to say more in future posts, but here I’ll quickly list as what I think the cultures look like at their best and worst.
Combat Culture
At its best
Communicators can more fully focus their attention on their ideas the content rather than devoting thought to the impact of their speech acts on the emotions of others.
Communication can be direct and unambiguous when it doesn’t need to be “cushioned” to protect feelings.
The very combativeness and aggression prove to all involved that they’re respected and included.
At its worst
The underlying truth-seeking nature of conversation is lost and instead becomes a fight or competition to determine who is Right.
The combative style around ideas is abused to dismiss, dominate, bully, belittle, or exclude others.
It devolves into a status game.
Nurture Culture
At its best
Everyone is made to feel safe, welcomed, and encouraged to participate without fear of ridicule, dismissal, or judgment.
People assist each other to develop their ideas, seeking to find their strongest versions rather than attacking their weak points. Curiosity pervades.
At its worst
Fear of inducing a negative feeling in others and the need to create positive feelings and impressions of inclusion dominate over any truth-seeking goal.
Empathy becomes pathological and ideas are never criticized.
Communicators spend most of their thought and attention on the social interaction itself rather than the ideas they’re trying to exchange.
This content was moved from the main body of the post to this comment. After receiving some good feedback, I’ve decided I’ll follow the template of “advice section in comments” for most of my posts.
Some Quick Advice
Awareness
See if you can notice conversational cultures/styles which match what I’ve described.
Begin noticing if you lean towards a particular style.
Begin paying attention to whether those you discuss with might have a particular style, especially if it’s different from yours.
Start determining if different groups you’re a member of, e.g. clubs or workplaces, lean in one cultural direction or another.
Openness
Reflect on the advantages that cultures/styles different to your own have and others might use them instead.
Consider that on some occasions styles different to yours might be more appropriate.
Don’t assume that alternatives to your own culture are obviously wrong, stupid, bad, or lacking in skills.
Experimentation
Push yourself a little in the direction of adopting a non-default style for you. Perhaps you already do but push yourself a little more. Try doing so and feeling comfortable and open, if possible.
Ideal and Degenerate Forms of Each Culture
Unsurprisingly, each of the cultures has their advantages and weaknesses, mostly to do with when and where they’re most effective. I hope to say more in future posts, but here I’ll quickly list as what I think the cultures look like at their best and worst.
Combat Culture
At its best
Communicators can more fully focus their attention on their ideas the content rather than devoting thought to the impact of their speech acts on the emotions of others.
Communication can be direct and unambiguous when it doesn’t need to be “cushioned” to protect feelings.
The very combativeness and aggression prove to all involved that they’re respected and included.
At its worst
The underlying truth-seeking nature of conversation is lost and instead becomes a fight or competition to determine who is Right.
The combative style around ideas is abused to dismiss, dominate, bully, belittle, or exclude others.
It devolves into a status game.
Nurture Culture
At its best
Everyone is made to feel safe, welcomed, and encouraged to participate without fear of ridicule, dismissal, or judgment.
People assist each other to develop their ideas, seeking to find their strongest versions rather than attacking their weak points. Curiosity pervades.
At its worst
Fear of inducing a negative feeling in others and the need to create positive feelings and impressions of inclusion dominate over any truth-seeking goal.
Empathy becomes pathological and ideas are never criticized.
Communicators spend most of their thought and attention on the social interaction itself rather than the ideas they’re trying to exchange.