I want to quote part of a review on fanfiction.net by celopmuh that I completely agree with and that I think Eliezer should take into account:
“Let’s not narrow down the hypothesis space prematurely.”—Harry’s way of talking is getting tiresome, I hope he learns to adjust it to his audience (“let’s not rule out any possibilities too early”? I’m sure there is a non-lossy, good-sounding way to rephrase that). I understand this is intended, but his speech on “your brain just pattern-matches the hypothesis” turned out rather anticlimactic—it would sound much better if it was actually directed to Hogwarts students and not the readers.
No, that is the way that Harry thinks, the way that the ideas are constituted in his head. To expect someone largely oblivious to other people to automatically translate everything he says into language more suitable for them would be out of character, IMO.
In particular, when Harry really wants the right answer, when something important is on the line, I expect the analytical side to ramp up, and the social awareness side to ramp down.
Yeah. Harry talks this way. It’s not an authorial accident. It’s meant to be alienating and offputting to his peers, emphasizing the distance between Harry and a normal 11-year old.
I think when he’s trying to communicate with someone Harry can speak on their level, but when he’s upset he goes back to talking like a robot.
I think this is doubly emphasized by the bit where Draco struggles to rephrase his thoughts without using “Harry words”, but given that the fic is meant as an evangelizing platform for rationality it makes me wonder whether there’s a good way to lessen the turnoff of such speech.
Ideally we’d have Hermione and Draco speaking the same ideas in a more colloquial fashion, but that would seem forced in all of the ways I can imagine it being done.
I want to quote part of a review on fanfiction.net by celopmuh that I completely agree with and that I think Eliezer should take into account:
No, that is the way that Harry thinks, the way that the ideas are constituted in his head. To expect someone largely oblivious to other people to automatically translate everything he says into language more suitable for them would be out of character, IMO.
In particular, when Harry really wants the right answer, when something important is on the line, I expect the analytical side to ramp up, and the social awareness side to ramp down.
I kinda like this way of talking.
And, after all, he’s talking to us.
Yeah. Harry talks this way. It’s not an authorial accident. It’s meant to be alienating and offputting to his peers, emphasizing the distance between Harry and a normal 11-year old.
I think when he’s trying to communicate with someone Harry can speak on their level, but when he’s upset he goes back to talking like a robot.
I think this is doubly emphasized by the bit where Draco struggles to rephrase his thoughts without using “Harry words”, but given that the fic is meant as an evangelizing platform for rationality it makes me wonder whether there’s a good way to lessen the turnoff of such speech.
Ideally we’d have Hermione and Draco speaking the same ideas in a more colloquial fashion, but that would seem forced in all of the ways I can imagine it being done.
Yes. I had the same problem at that age. When not concentrating, I would forget to phrase things in ways children could understand.